i need $1000 fast

[BrokeasaJoke]

Made lots of mistakes in my life, but I need $1000 fast tonight, or tommorow morning or I will die. What suggestions would you have, whether it be fraud, stealing, or just any fucking thing. God fucking dammit, I need to rob someone or something.

[Reptar]

Rob one of those fast cash places

[Fuggles]

Rob someone's house. Lower risk than a public place, with potentially higher reward. Or sell organs, you don't really NEED more than one lung or kidney or eye.

[Who's Got The Crack?]

Rob gas stations/stores, go downtown mug prostitutes?

[Reptar]

Bust into a couple of cars too jack steros n shit and pawn em off

[The English Gentleman]

Fuck ten fat chicks for $100 or one really fat chick for $1000...

[harry_hardcore_hoedown]

Fuck ten fat chicks for $100 or one really fat chick for $1000...

Lol, this.

If you have a job you could get a cash advance BTW.

[X61]

I'll pay you $1,000 to suck my dick.

[The English Gentleman]

Lol, this.

If you have a job you could get a cash advance BTW.

Recently alot of spam emails have been offering me moeny courtesy of a company called wages advanced, maybe you could try them, they look like they would give money out irresponsibly, only problem being you would need to get the moeny in pounds and have a job in england, so I am thinking the fat chicks makes more sense, oh one more addition.

You could fuck someone with aids who is desperate for $10,000

[harry_hardcore_hoedown]

What the fuck? My post count just went down by at least 5-10 posts.

[toker420]

tell me more about your situation, why are you going to die unless you come up with 1000 bux? You owe someone some money and they want to kill you over a 1000 bux well nigger i'd get strapped up or go down swinging atleast.

It used to take me atleast a few days to make 1000 when I scammed. When I broke into houses I could pull it off in a day if i hit a good lick. I'd recommend breakin into houses any day over robbin someone due to the time you get if your caught. you can get off fairly easy hittin up a house then you can robbing someone..

and lets say you rob someone and only get a few 100, you gotta go rob someone else, thats just another charge stacked right on up if your caught.

always remember never borrow what you can't pay back, never bite off more than you can chew cuz shit like this always comes up. I did time with people who got stabbed for gettin into debt over drug deals and not payin up on time.. its better to do without then go thru with all that drama shit. hopefully if this is the case you learn your lessen if you dont get killed.

[Natural Cure]

Owe the wrong people money?

[.it]

Fuck ten fat chicks for $100 or one really fat chick for $1000...

dam you quagmire. :mad:

[all_for_war]

if you have a gun go kill n rob a dealer that you dont know(only dealer that either sell soft, hard or heroin or any other hardcore drugs )

[HEVIHITR]

crowbar bar an atm ?

[BrokeasaJoke]

isn't there any ez scams with low probability to get caught?

[The English Gentleman]

dam you quagmire. :mad:

Finally, thankyou

[RebelForce]

hide in bushes outside a rich persons house with a baseball bat at 6 am, when they go to get in their lexus/porsche for work hit them over the head with the baseball bat and drive away in the lexus/porsche

try for a porsche so the cops wont catch you

[Actor]

kill the person who's gonna kill you before he kills you

[The Wutt]

isn't there any ez scams with low probability to get caught?

there's some easy scams with low probability of getting caught, but probably none where you could make $1000 overnight. you could put $20 in a matchbox and tell someone to put in $20 and sell them the matchbox and the contents for $30. you'd make $10 each time you do it since you only put in $20 and your getting $30 back. or do that on a bigger scale and make more. Look up change raising and start hitting up a bunch of 7/11's. or dig through dumpsters and find a box a laptop or something came in, put a stack of printing paper and some foam peanuts in it, and sell it to someone for $1000. or pick pockets, snatch purses, hold a millionaire's daughter for ransom, be creative.

[RoundElephant]

there's some easy scams with low probability of getting caught, but probably none where you could make $1000 overnight. you could put $20 in a matchbox and tell someone to put in $20 and sell them the matchbox and the contents for $30. you'd make $10 each time you do it since you only put in $20 and your getting $30 back. or do that on a bigger scale and make more. Look up change raising and start hitting up a bunch of 7/11's. or dig through dumpsters and find a box a laptop or something came in, put a stack of printing paper and some foam peanuts in it, and sell it to someone for $1000. or pick pockets, snatch purses, hold a millionaire's daughter for ransom, be creative.


What the fuck are you talking about?

[The Wutt]

What the fuck are you talking about?

he wanted to know how he could make some money. so i told him a couple ways. jump off my dick.

[RoundElephant]

he wanted to know how he could make some money. so i told him a couple ways. jump off my dick.

I'm asking you what you mean by that match box scam. It makes no sense.

[The Wutt]

I'm asking you what you mean by that match box scam. It makes no sense.

oh, you put 20 bucks in a matchbox, then tell someone else to put 20 bucks in, then sell it to them for 30 bucks. their first thought will be "hey, i'm gonna get $40 for $30, okay, i'll do it." but they wont think that $20 of that money was already theirs, so they only got $20, but they paid you $30, so they're out $10.

[RoundElephant]

oh, you put 20 bucks in a matchbox, then tell someone else to put 20 bucks in, then sell it to them for 30 bucks. their first thought will be "hey, i'm gonna get $40 for $30, okay, i'll do it." but they wont think that $20 of that money was already theirs, so they only got $20, but they paid you $30, so they're out $10.

A 4 year old would not fall for that.

[Warped Mindless]

1: Call up drug dealer, set up drug deal
2: Stake out his house
3: watch him leave
4: ?????
5: PROFIT

[The Wutt]

A 4 year old would not fall for that.

it works tho, and if someone was smart enough to catch it, you couldn't get into any shit, kuz technically you haven't conned them yet. yeah, they'd know you were trying to, but you didn't actually do it.

[RoundElephant]

it works tho, and if someone was smart enough to catch it, you couldn't get into any shit, kuz technically you haven't conned them yet. yeah, they'd know you were trying to, but you didn't actually do it.

They'd beat your ass, and nobody would fall for that in the first place. There is no confusion in place that would make them fall for it. It is straight up stupid.

[The Wutt]

They'd beat your ass, and nobody would fall for that in the first place. There is no confusion in place that would make them fall for it. It is straight up stupid.

Yeah, there is confusion there, they see $40, and you offer it to them for $30. thats the confusion. you're straight up stupid.

[RoundElephant]

Yeah, there is confusion there, they see $40, and you offer it to them for $30. thats the confusion. you're straight up stupid.

But then they say, Oh i just put $20 bucks i this. And they commence the beating.


Besides how are you expecting them to put $20 dollar in at first, then suddenly forget that they did and pay $30 for it.

[The Wutt]

But then they say, Oh i just put $20 bucks i this. And they commence the beating.


Besides how are you expecting them to put $20 dollar in at first, then suddenly forget that they did and pay $30 for it.

no, you don't get it, they see $40, they pay $30 for it, they think they've just made some money. try it on a friend, i guarantee it will work. and stop being a douche and criticizing people who are trying to help other people. i've done it, it works, if BrokeasaJoke doesn't think it will work, he doesn't have to do it, there are plenty of alteratives for getting money. 'nuf said.

[RoundElephant]

no, you don't get it, they see $40, they pay $30 for it, they think they've just made some money. try it on a friend, i guarantee it will work. and stop being a douche and criticizing people who are trying to help other people. i've done it, it works, if BrokeasaJoke doesn't think it will work, he doesn't have to do it, there are plenty of alteratives for getting money. 'nuf said.

Your being a douche, it will not work.

I don't know what type of retards you converse with but ANYONE I know would say "Why would I pay a total of $50 bucks for $40 bucks."

[The Wutt]

Your being a douche, it will not work.

I don't know what type of retards you converse with but ANYONE I know would say "Why would I pay a total of $50 bucks for $40 bucks."

i suggest you go do some puzzles, maybe play some Brain Age or some shit, sharpen that mind up.

[RoundElephant]

i suggest you go do some puzzles, maybe play some Brain Age or some shit, sharpen that mind up.

Ok your right.

If he finds some sort of place where 100 retards congregate he can pull this scam off.

Assuming they each have $50 he can periodically pull this scam off one by one.

100 retards later he will have $1000

(i wish there was a sarcastic smiley, this will have to do: :smartass:)

[Nisko]

Your being a douche, it will not work.

I don't know what type of retards you converse with but ANYONE I know would say "Why would I pay a total of $50 bucks for $40 bucks."

YOU PUT 20 IN, YOU ASK THEM TO PUT 20 IN

Total = 40

You sell it to them for 30, they think they're getting a deal.

You take their 30 turning a 10 dollar profit.

Fucking idiot.


This only works if you do it quickly.

[BiggLJ]

He's telling the truth guys the matchbox scam works great. I've been doing it for 3 months and I've made approximately $4.7 million, I drive a Bentley and I own a mansion out in Malibu.

[EllisD]

Sweet BIG, are you actually scarface! Switched from cocaine to matchboxes, fucking nice bro.!
I think im gonna try that trick on my mom, cuz she isnt the brightest person :)

[all_for_war]

isn't there any ez scams with low probability to get caught?

if you have a bank account and need the money urgently you can put a empty envelope in a bank machine and withdraw cash...

[bond92]

1. hold up a store or bank
2. Borrow from someone that feels sorry for you.
3. Break into a vending machine
4. go to a public place and snatch purses/steal wallets

[toker420]

RIP brokeasajoke

that nigga was always broke :(

[cheech]

You could wait for the guy whos gonna kill u in the morning and steal 1000 bucks off him...

[GermanyOrFlorida]

if you have a bank account and need the money urgently you can put a empty envelope in a bank machine and withdraw cash...

The atm gives your account a temporary credit for the amount written on the envelope, and it let's you then withdraw that amount immediately.
Is that how it works?

[julianf]

there's some easy scams with low probability of getting caught, but probably none where you could make $1000 overnight. you could put $20 in a matchbox and tell someone to put in $20 and sell them the matchbox and the contents for $30. you'd make $10 each time you do it since you only put in $20 and your getting $30 back. or do that on a bigger scale and make more. Look up change raising and start hitting up a bunch of 7/11's. or dig through dumpsters and find a box a laptop or something came in, put a stack of printing paper and some foam peanuts in it, and sell it to someone for $1000. or pick pockets, snatch purses, hold a millionaire's daughter for ransom, be creative.

this guy has it!

[Godfrey]

get a payday loan
oh wait you prolly aren't old enough

"you could put $20 in a matchbox and tell someone to put in $20 and sell them the matchbox and the contents for $30. you'd make $10 each time you do it since you only put in $20 and your getting $30 back."

what kind of retard would fall for that? who would even give you the time of day to do that? they'd have to be serious retards for that to work or even to give you the time of day to try it. most people would tell you to fuck off

[FuckSociety]

Nigga you dead

[-Fuck-]

lol @ OP's username regarding this thread.

[TheRascalKing]

Stop bumping threads trying to talk to long gone members.

[jram]

Who would be dumb enough to fall for that matchbox scam?

[Fanglekai]

lol necrobump

Cash 4 Gold
Car Title Loans

or my favorite: Use your bank card to withdraw money from your checking or savings account.

[komokazi]

Who would be dumb enough to fall for that matchbox scam?

Yeah I'm not sure I even understand who the fuck would do that? I mean, sure there are stupid people, but how many people would you have to look stupid in front of before you found the idiot that would actually go through with this? You'd make more finding a legit job and actually contributing to society instead of being a retarded leech with no smart money-making ideas. I'm not a moralfag, but if you are so stupid as to resort to stupid shit like this matchbox bullshit, do yourself a favor and ask me if I'd like fries with that. It's the only option you truly have.

[reject]

Who would be dumb enough to fall for that matchbox scam?

Tacho.

[TheRascalKing]

^ Banned.

:o

[killer.lead]

Brokers a...get in touch with me. Hope your not dead but I need help too. My soul existence on zoklet is to find a chop shop. I don't care bout what people say...people that play games get nothing done.

I got 3 rides..believe it or not. All need to go.
Email me...yahoo
Killer.lead

[JoeStalin]

Killer.lead is a fed

[julianf]

Killer.lead is a fed

why

[INEEDMONEY]

why

Most likely because that is the career he picked out for himself. I cant think of many other reasons.

[johngoe]

shit pm me if you trying to get some money foreal and got a little change least 150. dont really want to talk to any mud farmers tho lol..even tho i am one..they be the pigs

[Issue313]

http://i143.photobucket.com/albums/r150/MuyThaiFighter/Funny%20Pics/1595201-oh_look_its_this_thread_again_super.jpg

[Psychotogen]

Who would be dumb enough to fall for that matchbox scam?

I think you'd be suprised.

You're talking to a bunch of people who spend hours and hours a day reading and researching shit. Normal people don't do that.

[Ordinator]

I think you'd be suprised.

You're talking to a bunch of people who spend hours and hours a day reading and researching shit. Normal people don't do that.

True, problem is most people on here only know theory about most stuff they are talking about (including me), Average age here is somewhere between 18-23 years old, and they are looking to make easy money by theft and fraud. I bet many people here think that fraud is untracable and you can live whole life doing it but reality is its a federal crime and the investigator who will investigate your crime has 7+ years of expirience of catching people just like you so unless you do it perfectly and leave no witnesses you are going for a visit in a cage. Not to mention how many people here are just high and talking about killing someone when you are high is as easy as milking a cow or flipping burgers at McDonalds. Most people dont have the guts of even going and burgalizing an open garage in 2 am and would shit their pants trying to pass forged checks.

People who make real momey of this are working 11 hours a day and dont have time to chat on forums.