Sex ed for 5 year olds

[xilikeeggs0]

My boyfriend is taking a speech class this semester. The teacher decided to give everyone an awkward topic to try to make them more comfortable with giving speeches, which I think is bullshit. But anyways, what the hell are you supposed to say to 5 year olds about sex?

And while we're on the topic, what age do you guys think is appropriate to start talking to kids about sex? Do you think it should be something they learn in school, or should parents be in charge of it?

Inb4JoePedo.

[Euda]

That's a great way to do it. It'll broaden his perspective.

What constraints does he have? Is he allowed to get the audience to participate, via questions? Can he use a powerpoint? Can he give out candy or chocolates?

He can introduce them to the basics of clinical sex, to the giggling of all. Penis, vagina, hygiene, when they get older their body will go through changes, and that sort of thing.

[Anima Mundi]

Tell them everything he knows. Fuck, I hate societal taboos :facepalm:

[Euda]

Hopefully, he wouldn't have time to fit everything he knows about sex into a little speech assignment.

That being said, most five year old kids don't exactly have the attention span to sit back and listen to a long speech.

[xilikeeggs0]

That's a great way to do it. It'll broaden his perspective.

What constraints does he have? Is he allowed to get the audience to participate, via questions? Can he use a powerpoint? Can he give out candy or chocolates?

He can introduce them to the basics of clinical sex, to the giggling of all. Penis, vagina, hygiene, when they get older their body will go through changes, and that sort of thing.

It's a group thing, and from what I understand, he's going to be playing the 5 year old, asking a bunch of awkward questions. He just briefly mentioned it to me, so I don't know all of the details. I don't think they're going to be using a powerpoint, but I'm sure they'll have visual aids of some sort. As for the candy, I'm sure he could, but why?

[Euda]

Because you can encourage kids with candy. If they play a visual aid-based game, such as Sex Jeopardy, then they can reward the kids with candy.

Bribery is always a solid presentation tactic. You can always throw candy at any issue, when kids are involved.

[xilikeeggs0]

Because you can encourage kids with candy. If they play a visual aid-based game, such as Sex Jeopardy, then they can reward the kids with candy.

Bribery is always a solid presentation tactic. You can always throw candy at any issue, when kids are involved.

That's a good idea, but I don't think it's appropriate for 5 year olds. I don't think they would even be able to understand the concept of Jeopardy.

Plus, giving kids candy during a sex ed class just seems wrong to me. I can just see a guy driving this van (http://hunch.se/stuff/free_candy.jpg) going "Hey, I'll give you free candy and some sex ed, just like your teacher did!"

[jackketch]

One day, aged 6ish, my eldest came back from german primary school with homework for his sex ed class. He was to draw a Micheal and Michelle in the shower together, with particular emphasis on the differences.

The sex act itself was explain by a picture of puzzle parts fitting together.

And yet German has almost as many unwanted pregnancies a year as the UK.

[Euda]

Games are good for with kids; you have to keep things lively and interesting, rather than leaving things with a boring speech.

Having them draw a picture would be a good tactic too. When I was little, I think we had connect the dots puzzles for sex ed.

[xxombie]

Hahah. Just make sure he doesn't do anything that could get him in trouble. Do the parents of these five year olds know some random guy is going to be telling their children about genitallia?

[Thecosmicexplosion]

Show him to the internet, I was exposed to porn at age 9 (By poking around in my fathers room) I am now 19 and quite excellent in bed amongst other things, It will only do good to expose them!

In my opinion

[Anima Mundi]

excellent in bed...
In my opinion

Lol. Just lol.

[Awkibo]

what happened to the age old adage of when a man and a women (or any combination in between) love each other very much etc.

[xilikeeggs0]

Hahah. Just make sure he doesn't do anything that could get him in trouble. Do the parents of these five year olds know some random guy is going to be telling their children about genitallia?

He's not actually giving the speech to 5 year olds. He's giving it to his class.

[Knight of Blackness]

IT goes a little something like this:

:snacking::fap:

[THIS IS IMPORTANT GODDAMNIT]

The opening slide needs to have a naked lady and man just standing there with their gear out, that would get any kids attention.

[Death_Merchant]

Reminds me of monty python's "The meaning of life." Guy fucks his old lady in front of the class, lol. Priceless skit.

Anyways, there is no appropriate age across the board, but it's essentially when kids ask you about it, you take them to the zoo. Or just tell them the truth about it. It's not like you need to go into graphic detail or anything. It actually does no more good or harm, at any age. The most important thing you can teach young people is responsibility, and that doesn't seem to work at any age. Considering the sexual dysfunction that exists in this age, I'd say sex and sexuality aren't talked about, or normalized enough. Sex is a normal thing to do, there is no shame in it, and everyone who isn't a nun or freak, will likely have sex. Only people who think sex is inappropriate in itself, would think it's an inappropriate thing to teach when a kid asks.

For me, I was sexual younger than what most people would call normal. I remember playing doctor with girls when I was 4. The first time I had sex, I was 7, with a 6 year old girl. Long story short, it's the right time when kids ask, or they'll learn on their own. I probably would have waited, and avoided a lot of problems that left me feeling like a predator, and falling into depression.

[JoePedo]

And while we're on the topic, what age do you guys think is appropriate to start talking to kids about sex?

Birth. WTF do you want to do - lie to them? "Don't worry, honey, reality actually doesn't exist?"

No. If it comes up, it's a topic like any other. Your job, in fact, is to explain the whole universe to them without prejudice. You're the impartial science consultant and personal assistant to this person, and it's your job to have some professional ethics - honesty, integrety openness, and loyalty to the wishes of your client, the kid. 'n this alone.

Now, on to the subject...

from what I understand, he's going to be playing the 5 year old, asking a bunch of awkward questions.

I. ADVOCATE. MASS. TROLLING.

Seriously, an opportunity for win like this... well, he's going to only get this chance once in a lifetime. TROLL FUCKING EVERYTHING!!

...just think of the most bizzare, most awkward for the person asked, and most realistic questions that could happen. "One time I walked in on my mommy and daddy and they were naked and wrestling and beating each other and making grunting noises. Could you tell me about that?"

...and if you really want to have fun, learn the most destructive possible uses of the word... "why??" It is win... "Well, hon, your mommy and daddy were engaged in what is known as sexual intercourse, in which the man puts his penis in the woman's vagina..." "...why?" Yes, "why" is a treasure for monkeywrenching the fuck out of everything. Since the lecturers are mature, rational adults, they can handle it, right? It is win...

Troll fucking everything. Major lulz ensue. Profit, it is good...

p.s. I wholeheartedly reccomend your boyfriend constantly use the most bizzare slang terms he can come up with, regardless of how many times the lecturer gives the scientific names. Be sure to rotate... "oozing vagoogoo" one minute, moving on to "chichihole" the next and "vajayjay" on the question after that.

This will milk more lulz from an already epic situation. Surely he'll get a few more grade points for realistically making it as awkward for the lecturer as possible, no? If not... he can always blame the fact that the teacher said awkwardness was the point of this exercise...

Go do it. Win one for the gipper...

[AnalHerpes]

I got the sex talk when I was seven or eight from a 12 year old which I then turned around and told a bunch of people in my class. I think most of them ended up fine.

To kids, nothing is really that strange if it's told to them by someone older. It'll get them used to saying penis and vagina without laughing when they get sex ed in fifth grade.

[Duelist]

i think these 5 year olds need a little hands on experience.

http://www.katiefleck.com/pictures/2007/white_van.jpg

[azalie]

Knowledge is power. Kids can only make responsible decisions the sooner they learn about each and every factor. However, this only works if it's explained properly, 5 is fine.

I had it explained at 3 in the most wrong way but I'm (kind of) thankful. It started with rape. :facepalm:

Edit: I wasn't raped, that came out wrong.

[xilikeeggs0]

Birth. WTF do you want to do - lie to them? "Don't worry, honey, reality actually doesn't exist?"

No. If it comes up, it's a topic like any other. Your job, in fact, is to explain the whole universe to them without prejudice. You're the impartial science consultant and personal assistant to this person, and it's your job to have some professional ethics - honesty, integrety openness, and loyalty to the wishes of your client, the kid. 'n this alone.

Now, on to the subject...



I. ADVOCATE. MASS. TROLLING.

Seriously, an opportunity for win like this... well, he's going to only get this chance once in a lifetime. TROLL FUCKING EVERYTHING!!

...just think of the most bizzare, most awkward for the person asked, and most realistic questions that could happen. "One time I walked in on my mommy and daddy and they were naked and wrestling and beating each other and making grunting noises. Could you tell me about that?"

...and if you really want to have fun, learn the most destructive possible uses of the word... "why??" It is win... "Well, hon, your mommy and daddy were engaged in what is known as sexual intercourse, in which the man puts his penis in the woman's vagina..." "...why?" Yes, "why" is a treasure for monkeywrenching the fuck out of everything. Since the lecturers are mature, rational adults, they can handle it, right? It is win...

Troll fucking everything. Major lulz ensue. Profit, it is good...

p.s. I wholeheartedly reccomend your boyfriend constantly use the most bizzare slang terms he can come up with, regardless of how many times the lecturer gives the scientific names. Be sure to rotate... "oozing vagoogoo" one minute, moving on to "chichihole" the next and "vajayjay" on the question after that.

This will milk more lulz from an already epic situation. Surely he'll get a few more grade points for realistically making it as awkward for the lecturer as possible, no? If not... he can always blame the fact that the teacher said awkwardness was the point of this exercise...

Go do it. Win one for the gipper...

I really wish I could convince him to do that.

[The English Gentleman]

As long as said teaching involves NO practicals, then still no, especially to the lower classes, whose shit poor parents will already expose them to too much sexual behaviour, or if you are going to teach them, make sure they are shit scared of sex, tell them something like 80% of men have STI's and all STI' kill people.

p.s. I mean no Practical teaching, I realise the above may sound a bit different, my bad.

[AnalHerpes]

As long as said teaching involves NO practicals, then still no, especially to the lower classes, whose shit poor parents will already expose them to too much sexual behaviour, or if you are going to teach them, make sure they are shit scared of sex, tell them something like 80% of men have STI's and all STI' kill people.

If you're going to go that route, you should convince kids to get a sample of their semen (as soon as they hit pube) stored for when they want to have kids then get a castration. That way, when they realize what's what, it will be too late.

Alternatively, you can skip the first step.

[The English Gentleman]

If you're going to go that route, you should convince kids to get a sample of their semen (as soon as they hit pube) stored for when they want to have kids then get a castration. That way, when they realize what's what, it will be too late.

Alternatively, you can skip the first step.

I think i might have made a mistake where it sounds like I approve of kiddy fiddling, I meant no practical teaching, ever and still no theoretical teaching, ever. And no castration just put fear into kids. It is a travesty that a girls future can become to have a couple of kids and live of benefits. Not only that but the kids normally do not end up stellar, they are the produce of lower class idiots and raised with little stimulation, i.e. many never even get the chance to learn a musical instrument.

[JoePedo]

As long as said teaching involves NO practicals. Make sure they are shit scared of sex, tell them something like 80% of men have STI's and all STI' kill people.

Yeah. Life would be fucked up if college students ever knew that people fuck.

We must save teh kollege stuudentz for tehyr innocents. Otherwise, they might become pregnate.

[The English Gentleman]

Yeah. Life would be fucked up if college students ever knew that people fuck.

We must save teh kollege stuudentz for tehyr innocents. Otherwise, they might become pregnate.

Oh no, college students are OK, they at least will in general have been raised by middle class or above parents or have by some fluke turned out half decent even though coming from a poor social background.

[AnalHerpes]

So you're suggesting we have different sex ed based on social classes?

Eugenics FTW.

[The English Gentleman]

So you're suggesting we have different sex ed based on social classes?

Eugenics FTW.

No mainly that any state school should not teach such things (unless they are grammer schools), for private schools it would be optional, though most probably would not. Poor students do go to private schools on full scholarships and grammer schools offer poorer students an entrance to an actually decent life whereas Comprehensives are very hit and miss.

[psycho_8b]

How is babby formed?

[pill popper]

Can he give out candy or chocolates?

.

How did i know you were going to add that Lol

[redhead]

Why is there such a taboo with children knowing about sex? It doesn't mean they are going to start having it and would probably help those being sexually abused (apparently really common but cannot remember the statistics) do something while 5-12 instead of learning it at 14 and developing more issues.

As for education responsibility, I think it needs to be school as many parents have no idea. School gives the facts, parents morality. Will never recover from a sex ed class where the teacher gave us condoms and told us to "start young while you can still enjoy it, no strings."

[Anima Mundi]

How is babby formed?

i dunno, lol?

[psycho_8b]

i dunno, lol?

Hehehehe...Dubs to the TOTSE user who posted that in S&A a while back...Still makes me giggle!

[Xiao Mei]

One day, aged 6ish, my eldest came back from german primary school with homework for his sex ed class. He was to draw a Micheal and Michelle in the shower together, with particular emphasis on the differences.

The sex act itself was explain by a picture of puzzle parts fitting together.

And yet German has almost as many unwanted pregnancies a year as the UK.

My 7 year old daughter came home from school with a picture of Jesus standing around with his lambs. The picture said, "Jesus doesn't want any of his lambs to do drugs." (I swear I'm not making this up.)

Did I mention that my daughter goes to a PUBLIC school??

So my point is, American teachers are too busy spreading the word of God (illegally, might I add) to teach about evil subjects like SEX.

[Death_Merchant]

My 7 year old daughter came home from school with a picture of Jesus standing around with his lambs. The picture said, "Jesus doesn't want any of his lambs to do drugs." (I swear I'm not making this up.)

Did I mention that my daughter goes to a PUBLIC school??

So my point is, American teachers are too busy spreading the word of God (illegally, might I add) to teach about evil subjects like SEX.

That's cause lambs have hooves, and would spill the bong water all over Jesus' new sandals. Total party foul.

Seriously though, I agree with you. Teacher's personal beliefs about sex could jeopardize the quality of the program in a big way. I live in Canada, but we have similar problems with teachers pushing their Christian beliefs in the classroom. I can imagine the BS that would spew forth from their mouths, and the kids would get a half-assed lesson.

[EssJay]

make sure they are shit scared of sex, tell them something like 80% of men have STI's and all STI' kill people.

http://www.spscriptorium.com/SPBios/MsChoksondik.jpg?

[Death_Merchant]

Why is there such a taboo with children knowing about sex? It doesn't mean they are going to start having it and would probably help those being sexually abused (apparently really common but cannot remember the statistics) do something while 5-12 instead of learning it at 14 and developing more issues.

As for education responsibility, I think it needs to be school as many parents have no idea. School gives the facts, parents morality. Will never recover from a sex ed class where the teacher gave us condoms and told us to "start young while you can still enjoy it, no strings."

The statistics in Canada are 1 in 3 for girls, and 1 in 6 for boys.

I feel there is a general taboo about sex that ranges beyond children, but that's where it starts. Lots of people have sexual dysfunctions as a result of societal morals. Sex is a dirty word still, even in these so called learned times. How many women here won't tell how many partners they've had due to judgment? If sex was more excepted, people would care less about the amount of people you've had sex with, and more about how you practice sex. I don't care about a woman's numbers, but if she picks up random men from bars for unprotected sex, I wouldn't fuck her because it's an obvious health concern to me. I wouldn't bash people for having a bunch of partners if they practiced safe sex, and have only had unprotected sex with people they knew and trusted to keep them clean. I still want a girl to be tested before I'll engaged in unprotected sex with them. Aids and hep C are for life.

[Anima Mundi]

http://www.spscriptorium.com/SPBios/MsChoksondik.jpg?

Perfect description of what should be done. Tell him to quote her.

[genericwittyusername]

Sex ed should start as soon as possible. I bet we'd still get a lot of shitheads breeding anyways, though.

[Jizzmeister]

Reminds me of monty python's "The meaning of life." Guy fucks his old lady in front of the class, lol. Priceless skit.

This, lol http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTMlZSKEu-Y :fap:

[Thecosmicexplosion]

This, lol http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTMlZSKEu-Y :fap:

It's an ocarina sir


ahahaha that made me chuckles

[Ðvlad]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCQwxFaM__g