A real dilemma.

[Death_Merchant]

I have a huge dilemma to deal with this year. I met a woman, and she means a lot to me, but she lives in another province. We get along extremely well, and I definitely see this as something that is long-lasting. She really doesn't want to move, cause she loves the city she lives in. I can't move until I finish my technical training here, but I could at the end of the year. I would also like to live where she is, but there is a problem.

The problem is that I work for a family business. My Dad plans on retiring in the next 5 years, and wants me to take over his shares for him. He worked his ass off to get his company off the ground, and really doesn't want to see his hard work fade to nothing but a good cash out. Also, it's likely that if I don't take over, backed by my Dad, the foreman that works for him will likely try and become partner with my cousin. My Uncle is the other half owner of the business. My Dad hates the foreman, as in past years he's treated me like shit, and he doesn't want to see his company benefiting the foreman.

So basically, if my new girl refuses to move here, I'm stuck with the decision to either honoring my father and take the reigns, or leave to be with the person I love. It means a lot to my Dad for me to take over. It's also a pretty good paying job, well into the six figures. Good years I'll make 400K, and 150K on a bad year. That's not including money I'll garner from future investments. By 40, I figure I'll be making 1-2 million a year. By This will obviously give me a very well off life. However, having someone to love, and start a family with is truly a more important goal to me. Money is great to have, but without a great wife by my side and a couple of kids, what's the point of having it? The whole reason my Dad did what he did was to make sure his family was taken great care of. If I did move, I'd probably start a new business for myself anyways, but it wouldn't be established, and would take a few years before I'd be reaping the same rewards.


Tl/Dr Have to choose at the end of the year whether or not I want to move away to be with someone I love, or honor my family and take over shares in a company.

What would you guys do?

[Duelist]

Sounds like this girl is a gold digger.

The most logical choice, then, is to kill your dear old dad.

Surely you will inherit all of his assets?

Then, the world is your oyster.

Move to Siam and cash in on the flourishing poppy trade.

[psycho_8b]

I would let my old man retire and take over the business.

I see what you're saying about love and all that...But why doesn't she move to your province? If there's love, why do you have to move?

Let's think...You honour your dad's wishes, you get a good business, you get money...And she won't move because she likes where she is?

Stay where you are.

[Saline Colors]

Definetley stay where you are. Your father is a priority and keeping your word to him is the most important thing to do.

You may feel like she's the "one" now, but I'm willing to bet she isn't the first girl to come along that you felt was the "one". You never know what's going to happen with her, and if she really cares about you, she'll understand your priorities include staying put and maybe something can be worked out.

Until then, phone calls and e-mails will have to do.

[Euda]

Follow your passion; that being said, it sounds like that's what your father did and he laid the foundations for you to be able to excel.

If she really cares and wants to build something with you, she should give living there a try.

You can always cash out of the business or find someone to run it for you while you're off in the city. Spend weekends with her and weekdays at work. Commute? You've got options.

[VagineMachine]

Originally Posted by psycho_8b

Let's think...You honour your dad's wishes, you get a good business, you get money...And she won't move because she likes where she is?

Stay where you are.

This.

[Nefret]

I remember a post you made on totse a while back, didn't you say you were married? I'm confused.
Aside from that, Don't move for her, you have responsibilities to your father and she would compromise too if she really loved you.

[jackketch]

With the amount you claim you'll be earning then you could probably have your cake and eat it.

You stay with your Dad and take over the biz-you'd feel a right twat if she doesn't turn out to be 'the one', however there are very few businesses these days that can't be on every other week from a laptop.

One week with your dad, then fly out for a week with her. Set the management structure up so you can do everything online and if there is a crisis then you just get on a plane.

[RIPtotse]

DUDE, HOLY SHIT SHIT SIAHGAHOMFH


serioulsy omfg...DO NOT LET A WOMAN TAKE THAT AWAY FROM YOU!!!!

you will regret it!!!

make the money man seriously....omfg i can't believe he is even considering this...

i mean i understand, but...take the job...please..please, take the job

[Death_Merchant]

Originally Posted by Jeff_Hunter

Sounds like this girl is a gold digger.

The most logical choice, then, is to kill your dear old dad.

Surely you will inherit all of his assets?

Then, the world is your oyster.

Move to Siam and cash in on the flourishing poppy trade.

Lol, she's not a gold digger, and that's why I like her.

[Death_Merchant]

Originally Posted by Nefret

I remember a post you made on totse a while back, didn't you say you were married? I'm confused.
Aside from that, Don't move for her, you have responsibilities to your father and she would compromise too if she really loved you.

I'm not married. I was engaged up until spring of last year, but that didn't pan out for many reasons. The main one was that she was insecure, and started self-destructing the relationship. Can't exactly hold a relationship together when the other person isn't trying to keep it together.

[superspeedz]

Originally Posted by Death_Merchant

I have a huge dilemma to deal with this year. I met a woman, and she means a lot to me, but she lives in another province. We get along extremely well, and I definitely see this as something that is long-lasting. She really doesn't want to move, cause she loves the city she lives in. I can't move until I finish my technical training here, but I could at the end of the year. I would also like to live where she is, but there is a problem.

The problem is that I work for a family business. My Dad plans on retiring in the next 5 years, and wants me to take over his shares for him. He worked his ass off to get his company off the ground, and really doesn't want to see his hard work fade to nothing but a good cash out. Also, it's likely that if I don't take over, backed by my Dad, the foreman that works for him will likely try and become partner with my cousin. My Uncle is the other half owner of the business. My Dad hates the foreman, as in past years he's treated me like shit, and he doesn't want to see his company benefiting the foreman.

So basically, if my new girl refuses to move here, I'm stuck with the decision to either honoring my father and take the reigns, or leave to be with the person I love. It means a lot to my Dad for me to take over. It's also a pretty good paying job, well into the six figures. Good years I'll make 400K, and 150K on a bad year. That's not including money I'll garner from future investments. By 40, I figure I'll be making 1-2 million a year. By This will obviously give me a very well off life. However, having someone to love, and start a family with is truly a more important goal to me. Money is great to have, but without a great wife by my side and a couple of kids, what's the point of having it? The whole reason my Dad did what he did was to make sure his family was taken great care of. If I did move, I'd probably start a new business for myself anyways, but it wouldn't be established, and would take a few years before I'd be reaping the same rewards.


Tl/Dr Have to choose at the end of the year whether or not I want to move away to be with someone I love, or honor my family and take over shares in a company.

What would you guys do?

Take the company if the girl really loves you she will come for you.
There will be plenty of other girls if she doesn't come.

[Saline Colors]

Originally Posted by Death_Merchant

I'm not married. I was engaged up until spring of last year, but that didn't pan out for many reasons. The main one was that she was insecure, and started self-destructing the relationship. Can't exactly hold a relationship together when the other person isn't trying to keep it together.

Are you joking? This should tell you to never assume something is going to work out and to never burn bridges because of a relationship.

[Death_Merchant]

I'm most likely going to be staying put. It's going to be a long year anyways, and my mind may change before it's up. It's pretty hard to walk away from a secure life. I'm going to be spending the year trying to convince her to make the move out here. She should be able to do a transfer within her company, so she might go for it. Between our two salaries, it shouldn't be a problem if she wants to visit home every now and again to see her friends. I guess I could just knock her up too, lol.

She's definitely not a woman I want to just sluff off though. I have trouble finding women that I really like. I don't really care much for the women in my province, especially my, cause a lot of them are gold digging bitches that try and control men. I want none of that, thank you. She's a really smart woman, very pretty, and we think a lot a like. I think in the situation that I can't leave, she would likely come out here to be with me. If not, I guess it wasn't meant to be.

[Death_Merchant]

Originally Posted by Saline Colors

Are you joking? This should tell you to never assume something is going to work out and to never burn bridges because of a relationship.

True, and I agree. However, taking over isn't a for sure thing either. My uncle and cousin could use leverages to buy out my Dad, leaving me without the person I love, and no company. My Dad has told me that he'd back me to start one myself if this took place, but I do have the option of turning down the company now, and starting a new one where she lives. There are a lot of options to choose from, and nothing is really clear cut. Either way I'm likely to end up running my own company. Taking over an established company is obviously the route of least resistance, but it's not guaranteed at the moment.

[Silverfuck]

You have a real reason to not want to move. Family and business obligations trump "really loving your city" any day. Stay put; if she wants to come and join you then that's lovely, but don't remap your entire future around her.

[Death_Merchant]

Originally Posted by Silverfuck

You have a real reason to not want to move. Family and business obligations trump "really loving your city" any day. Stay put; if she wants to come and join you then that's lovely, but don't remap your entire future around her.

I probably won't. Life has taught me something though. Never base your decision on what the you think the future will be, but be open to what the future can be. Nothing is set in stone, and things can change fast. I always do what I feel I need to do at the time, and never regret it, cause I know I did it for a reason good enough to make the decision at the time. I honestly see both choices as a risk of losing something better, which is why it's a dilemma. Being handed a business is a rare opportunity that shouldn't be overlooked. However, finding someone who truly understands you and is a perfect life partner, is also something that should not be overlooked.

My Dad is a very smart man. He told me this. " I started my business because I wanted to benefit my family. Also that getting married and having kids is the best thing he's ever done with his life." And that," Money is something you wish to obtain to benefit the ones you love. It's a very empty life to end up with lots of money, and no loving family to benefit." An unhappy millionaire is still unhappy. My Dad is a very selfless man, and spends a lot of his money to make sure my brother and I get a good start in life. He gave me a truck when my vehicle broke down and couldn't afford to replace it. He bailed me out of debt when I fucked up and made some stupid choices. He's also really supported me in life to accomplish my goals. Saying that, he would be a little disappointed if I didn't take over for him, cause he wants to see me give my kids the things he couldn't give me when I was younger, when we lived just above poverty. However, he'd be even be more disappointed in me if I threw away happiness with someone special, just to take over for him. He'll respect my decisions either way cause he knows I'm not stupid. I may fuck up time to time, but I never give up on finding the life I need to find.

In a perfect world, I'll get the business and the girl. It's not a perfect world, and anything could happen. I'm sure the choice I need to make will come naturally when it's needed to be made.

[Ambient]

move bitch get out the way ho