Good (bad) ideas please

[themessenger]

I really shouldn't be writing this on the internet if I actually want to do anything, however, my only ideas are murder, and that is stupid as I'll end up in jail. So I'm looking for ideas that if anything, will get me a misdemeanour charge or a caution. So as attractive as murder and arson are, they are out of the question.

So here's the story;

I kept having these flashbacks to being hypnotised by certain people and having various things done to me. One of these was having the suns rays concentrated on to my skin with a magnifying glass in order to give me 'beauty spots' or 'sun spots', or their actual intention, as said to me 'moles which turn in to skin cancer'.

It was odd. I just kept having these flashbacks to it happening under hypnosis. When you're in trance you're not supposed to remember what happened to you. Or at least not immediately after. It coming back as flashbacks is possibly a normal occurrence.

Then something bizarre happened. I realised my flashbacks were not delusions or confabulations as I started busting out in moles/freckles in the exact places where I remembered being magnified. I got one on my ballsack, and one on my cockhead. I had a few appear on my neck and face, on my upper thighs, back etc. Places that do not get much sunlight, and even so, I am not prone to sun induced moles. All in the places where I remembered having it done to my under trance.

Oh, and right near my asshole. I checked that one out in a mirror because at that point I was certain I was losing it, but it was EXACTLY where I remembered it happening.

I had these moles checked out by a dermatologist and it turns out that they are not cancerous, or even pre-cancerous. They have regularly shaped borders etc. I had the ones on my face and neck removed. I even had one on my ear lobe.

Now another thing, that sealed the deal for me last night. I was looking myself up on pipl just to see what was out there about myself, and all I could find was some unclaimed money in my name that I can claim, and that was it. I found someone with a very similar, yet distant name to mine (their surname was the same, and their middle name was the same as my first name) who had a blog who wrote nothing on it except for their name and that they are 'a bad'.

Now, I recall these people saying in reference to me, and about me, "We can't find him but we can find his money!" or "We can't find you but we found your money." rather cryptically. I also, after this, had a spout where I would say "I'm XXXXX and I'm a bad." referencing exactly what was written on the blog of someone with a name similar to mine. So they got me with hypnosis and post hypnotic suggestion. That was what sealed it for me, my confabulations and delusions were not as such. It all clicked in to place.

Now, what should be done to these people? Take in to account they tried to kill me. Take in to account they made me perform actions against my will with their Jedi Mind Tricks (hypnosis). They are not good people. They're not even decent people. If someone killed someone with a gun I'd have more respect for them than someone who burns someone with a magnifying glass trying to give them cancer. That is just sadistic. Not to mention them trying to destroy my looks.

So far I have:

Names of all
Address of two
Place of work of all but one
Car and registration of one

What do you suggest I do?

[themessenger]

Another thing is I possibly can't get close to the targets as there is the risk of there being post hypnotic suggestion, so if the targets use a keyword that is in me to enter a state of sleep when they say it and I hear it, I'm fucked.

[themessenger]

Actually can all ideas please be legal?

They don't have to be kind, they don't have to be morally upstanding, but keeping all plans legal is a grand idea.

I'm not going to break the law.

[ShadyLady]

Moving this to GS. BI is for ILLEGAL discussion.

[themessenger]

I wouldn't plot a crime online that is dumb. Like plotting one over the phone.

The sub forum was about revenge. It fitted perfectly.

[ShadyLady]

LOL, no actually the sub forum is about ILLEGAL revenge. Anything in BI is about ILLEGAL activity.

[themessenger]

So you encourage plotting online about breaking the law?

You're an idiot.

[Miaow]

Originally Posted by themessenger

So you encourage plotting online about breaking the law?

You're an idiot.

I think it's quite clear that this is a discussion forum, not a planning with intent to commit forum.

You're a fucking moron.

[Fetus-Smasher]

Both of you, stfu.

[Helladamnleet]

Tag their houses. It's just criminal damage to property.

[TheSexyBeast821]

How did you get in the position to be hypnotized in the first place?

[themessenger]

Originally Posted by Miaow

I think it's quite clear that this is a discussion forum, not a planning with intent to commit forum.

You're a fucking moron.

You stupid cunt. Keep it in context. Have you ever seen the forum in question? People ask for advice saying it relates to them, or they use that acronym 'SWIM'. There are plenty of threads open there that are are more than mere discussion and are individuals soliciting advice, which would actually go against the forum criteria, yet they are still there.

Fuckwit.

[themessenger]

And in other news, people off Zoklet get arrested by the FBI for internet activities.

[BITCH TITZ]

themessenger got raped