Will to Live Ebbing Away

[Yggdrasil]

I've lately been under such tremendous strain. I've had competitions which have extorted the last of my intellectual capability. I've tarnished friendships, and realized just how backstabbing and unlikable people around me are. I've driven away friends. I've got a ton of homework. And just now, I've spent the past hour mediating a horrible row between my parents. Not to mention I'm trying to come to terms with my homosexuality.

My father wouldn't tell her where he was today after she asked him in a hostile tone, and so she assumed he was doing something nefarious, which he wasn't, because I had called him earlier and he and his business partner (my uncle) both had simply been out discussing plans.

It's a bit more complicated, but I won't go into details. The gist of it is, that recent things have me mentally spent. I don't want to put up with any bullcrap, and luckily, Spring break is coming up next week. Thoughts of suicide have been popping into my head for the first time, but it's none too serious.

/vent

[Yggdrasil]

Originally Posted by Mcrjtn

Put your faith in God, and you will be healed.

Religious views aside, I am an extremely self-reliant person, and more than a tad independent. It's my nature to resolve my problems through my own personal work and thinking.

[Joe Camel]

It sounds to me like you are stressed. Just chill out, things always get better with time.

[LiquidIce]

I'll remember that you're a homosexual

But I still like you .

Anyways, you seem the type of person that, when in a tough situation, will either make it tougher or try and cope with everything because you want to prove to yourself that you're able to cope with it.

You also seem to like meditation - has it been much help? Maybe try to sit down for an hour and read a good book? But only for an hour, since you said you've got loads of work. Taking a small break in utter solitude is able to energize people, relax 'em pretty good.

[LiquidIce]

Originally Posted by Mcrjtn

Hes just "gay" in a subconscious attempt to piss off his religious parents.

You're with him, eh? Don't trust the whole lot of you.
*waiting for reply of OP*

[Mirana]

Originally Posted by Mcrjtn

Put your faith in God, and you will be healed.

I lol'd

[Akagi]

Originally Posted by Mcrjtn

Put your faith in God, and you will be healed.

God invented disease.

Originally Posted by Mcrjtn

Nothing is more personal than one's search for God.

He said he wants to deal with the problems himself, not give up and hope some supernatural entity bails him out.

[Yggdrasil]

Oh, fuck. It seems like the whole row between my parents wasn't a row at all. Instead, it seems that my father is going through a midlife crisis. He's fed up with America, apparently, and wants to emigrate back to his native country. He's been a bit off-headed for a couple of years now, so this bullcrap doesn't surprise me in the least.

Regardless, I feel a tad better than I did before. I spent the afternoon with some friends on Friday, and it cheered my spirits over some other friends I've estranged from. Oh, and it looks like I'll be bunking in the same room for a week with a stunningly attractive friend of mine later this month.

Lots of things going on, and I'm just trying to take it all in calmly.

Originally Posted by Mcrjtn

Hes just "gay" in a subconscious attempt to piss off his religious parents.

That must explain why I felt these urges since childhood, when I was still "devout"

[ergoat]

Originally Posted by Stendhal Syndrome

It sounds to me like you are stressed. Just chill out, things always get better with time.

No they don't.

[Darkhunter]

Originally Posted by Mcrjtn

Put your faith in God, and you will be healed.

God hates gays so more then likely this seems like a bad idea

[poast-bortem!]

Originally Posted by Yggdrasil

I've lately been under such tremendous strain. Stop dating black men.
I've tarnished friendships, I've driven away friends. They are better off without you
I've got a ton of homework. Drop out. Chances are you'll work min. wage anyway.
Not to mention I'm trying to come to terms with my homosexuality. LOL FAGGOT

My father wouldn't tell her where he was today after she asked him in a hostile tone, and so she assumed he was doing something nefarious, which he wasn't, because I had called him earlier and he and his business partner (my uncle) both had simply been out discussing plans.

He's back on the needle. No doubt about it.

It's a bit more complicated, but I won't go into details. The gist of it is, that recent things have me mentally spent. I don't want to put up with any bullcrap, and luckily, Spring break is coming up next week. Thoughts of suicide have been popping into my head for the first time, but it's none too serious.

You should definately just kill yourself. Stop wasting oxygen and tax dollars.

/vent /you'll never make moderator

FFT. <---- Fixed For Truth. Did I just coin that little ditty...?

e: it's obvious that you're a faggot because you said ebbing.

who the fuck uses that word seriously?

[Yggdrasil]

Originally Posted by poast-bortem!

FFT. <---- Fixed For Truth. Did I just coin that little ditty...?

e: it's obvious that you're a faggot because you said ebbing.

who the fuck uses that word seriously?

You blind-sided twat. What's your deal with me, anyways? You're always saying some irrelevant, insulting shit to me (which I don't understand, since we've never actually had any sort of discussion), or jesting that I've run a failed bid for moderation, something which I cleared up months ago. Move on, or fuck off. Seriously.

[poast-bortem!]

Originally Posted by Yggdrasil

You blind-sided twat. What's your deal with me, anyways? You're always saying some irrelevant, insulting shit to me (which I don't understand, since we've never actually had any sort of discussion), or jesting that I've run a failed bid for moderation, something which I cleared up months ago. Move on, or fuck off. Seriously.

Don't get your panties in a bunch, queerbait.

The reason, and new reasons, that I insult you are justified to the fullest.

In my thread, "Metaphysicist Demodded," you were blatently suggesting that somebody needs to step up the plate and be a hardass, and that since "nobody was up to it," you thought you could "squeeze in while nobody was looking."

I pointed out the fact, and you denied it like a bitch. Every post I've seen you make is lamer than the entire post history of Tr1p and HandOfZek put together. Reading your posts is more painful than watching Opera

For srs: the last thing we need here is a homosexual moderator on a power-trip. stop trying so hard, man. we all notice your cries for attention but we've ALL established that we're not interested, move along now.

[Yggdrasil]

Originally Posted by poast-bortem!

Don't get your panties in a bunch, queerbait.

The reason, and new reasons, that I insult you are justified to the fullest.

In my thread, "Metaphysicist Demodded," you were blatently suggesting that somebody needs to step up the plate and be a hardass, and that since "nobody was up to it," you thought you could "squeeze in while nobody was looking."

I pointed out the fact, and you denied it like a bitch. Every post I've seen you make is lamer than the entire post history of Tr1p and HandOfZek put together. Reading your posts is more painful than watching Opera

For srs: the last thing we need here is a homosexual moderator on a power-trip. stop trying so hard, man. we all notice your cries for attention but we've ALL established that we're not interested, move along now.

Oh, get fucked. I clarified that I only meant to suggest so, and that what was perceived as a "blatant coup for modship" by some (you) was merely a failed attempt at sarcasm on my part. So there, fucking drop it. It seems that the forum is running relatively well without Metaphysicist, and that the hubbub that erupted after his departure was a bit hysterical in fashion.

[poast-bortem!]

Apparently, if I continue debating with you, I'm "derailing" this thread.

So you can take your justification and shove it up your ass faggot.

Have fun burning in hell.

/last poast

[Yggdrasil]

Originally Posted by poast-bortem!

Apparently, if I continue debating with you, I'm "derailing" this thread.

So you can take your justification and shove it up your ass faggot.

Have fun burning in hell.

/last poast

Nighty night...

[Joe Camel]

Originally Posted by Malkog

No they don't.

Well, you have to figure out why you feel the way you feel and what you can do to fix it. From then on out as you progress on fixing it things do get better.

[LiquidIce]

Btw, have parents ever been the type to tell you shit like "you're stupid, you'll never become "insert_career_here"" or something along those lines?

I've just had run ins with family and friends and some people say how they got fucked up in youth because they were told they won't accomplish anything.

[Yggdrasil]

Originally Posted by LiquidIce

Btw, have parents ever been the type to tell you shit like "you're stupid, you'll never become "insert_career_here"" or something along those lines?

I've just had run ins with family and friends and some people say how they got fucked up in youth because they were told they won't accomplish anything.

In a way, I guess. My father is a negative asshole, and tries to get everyone of my siblings to get some lame-ass job or to follow in his footsteps by saying that what we (my sibling) want is futile or pointless or stupid). He disapproves of my sister attending one of the finest universities in the country and studying art, and disapproves of what I want to study as well. My younger sister is a tool, and I guess she's given in to his bullshit.

[poast-bortem!]

It's not your Dad's fault. You two are simply victims of the times.

Your dad just wanted kids that weren't homosexual and/or attending shitty art school.

Nothing worse than watching your innocent child slowly turn into to a cocksucking faggot.

I'd be just as pissed, wouldn't you?

[Yggdrasil]

Originally Posted by poast-bortem!

It's not your Dad's fault. You two are simply victims of the times.

Your dad just wanted kids that weren't homosexual and/or attending shitty art school.

Nothing worse than watching your innocent child slowly turn into to a cocksucking faggot.

I'd be just as pissed, wouldn't you?

The only one acting like a faggot here is you. If you don't mean to discuss the general topic (i.e. be a HBtard) fuck the hell off. I wouldn't exactly call her university a "shitty art school" either, especially if I wasn't even capable of passing secondary school. Stop derailing the fucking thread.

[LiquidIce]

Ya know, stress is an internal thing. Some times I get really hit up on it - I wake up and think that my problems are fucking huge, but when I pop in some music, play a game or two, study, read a book it just goes away.

Being stressed out doesn't solve problems, so the best way, imho, to solve them is to stop the stress first a then solve them with a clear head.

If you're in a tight spot (homosexual, tight spot, ) then just maybe sit down, think about your priorities, think what are problems and what are "stress-points". Stress-points are things that bring a lot of unneeded stress in to life, things you're unsure about, things that might go wrong etc. Either stop thinking about them because letting them get you undermines any chances of success.

Oh, and the weather is beautiful, i could take pics and post a few tomorrow.

[poast-bortem!]

Originally Posted by Yggdrasil

The only one acting like a faggot here is you. If you don't mean to discuss the general topic (i.e. be a HBtard) fuck the hell off. I wouldn't exactly call her university a "shitty art school" either, especially if I wasn't even capable of passing secondary school. Stop derailing the fucking thread.

How can you call me a faggot when you're openly gay [!?]

My last post wasn't even derailing the thread. I stated that the reason your Dad is pissed was most likely because you and your sister phail as quality children.

P.S. - Nice touch calling me an HBtard. Very mod esque.

Too bad you'll never be a mod. Ever.

[NaiveMonarch]

You can suck my dick if you want.

[The Jitterskull]

This is the perfect time to restart life.

Could be an amazing turning moment for you it you want it to be.
It's sad how many people are flaming him for his choices in sexuality.

[LiquidIce]

Originally Posted by Nightside Eclipse

This is the perfect time to restart life.

Could be an amazing turning moment for you it you want it to be.
It's sad how many people are flaming him for his choices in sexuality.

Hey, I'm trying to give some advice to him.

[Haiti's Space Agency]

Originally Posted by poast-bortem!

It's not your Dad's fault. You two are simply victims of the times.

Your dad just wanted kids that weren't homosexual and/or attending shitty art school.

Nothing worse than watching your innocent child slowly turn into to a cocksucking faggot.

I'd be just as pissed, wouldn't you?

Probably this.

Did it cross your mind that maybe your father (parents in general) wants the best for his kids? I can't imagine he'd be too happy about seeing his daughter wasting his money going to a "prestigious" art school obtaining no skills necessary to life. Him being religious(from what I've gathered) and looking at his son being gay and whatnot can't make him too proud either. I'm not flaming you for being a fag, but you and your sister are probably the main contributors to his midlife crisis. Or he's grown disappointed with your mother's appearance.

[Dog]

Go to a 7-11 and get an ICEE. ICEEs always cheer me up.

And porn. Try some porn.

But seriously, people that are suicidal apparently have this ongoing mental "congress', where they are constantly weighing pros and cons. So, seek out the pros of life and keep those on the forefront of your mind. Could you really kill yourself after enjoying a juicy, old-fashioned style bacon cheeseburger? Or how about an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm or something equally funny?

[Vizier]

You need some beers.

[Yggdrasil]

Originally Posted by alexander224

Probably this.

Did it cross your mind that maybe your father (parents in general) wants the best for his kids? I can't imagine he'd be too happy about seeing his daughter wasting his money going to a "prestigious" art school obtaining no skills necessary to life. Him being religious(from what I've gathered) and looking at his son being gay and whatnot can't make him too proud either. I'm not flaming you for being a fag, but you and your sister are probably the main contributors to his midlife crisis. Or he's grown disappointed with your mother's appearance.

My father is being a selfish prick. He wants to relive his "glory days" back in his native countries, and he swears we at home (my family) can function without him. We can't. I may disagree with him on many fronts, but I still think he's a good person, and I cherish his company. We've been especially nice to him lately, and he'll still bring up his "ideas", bringing my mother to tears and me into anger. Textbook midlife crisis. Oh man...

p.s. I'm not openly gay

Originally Posted by LiquidIce

Ya know, stress is an internal thing. Some times I get really hit up on it - I wake up and think that my problems are fucking huge, but when I pop in some music, play a game or two, study, read a book it just goes away.

Being stressed out doesn't solve problems, so the best way, imho, to solve them is to stop the stress first a then solve them with a clear head.

If you're in a tight spot (homosexual, tight spot, ) then just maybe sit down, think about your priorities, think what are problems and what are "stress-points". Stress-points are things that bring a lot of unneeded stress in to life, things you're unsure about, things that might go wrong etc. Either stop thinking about them because letting them get you undermines any chances of success.

Oh, and the weather is beautiful, i could take pics and post a few tomorrow.

I don't think I can simply brush aside my "stress-points" and be magically happy. To be honest, I'm a bit befuddled by my situation, but not overly caught up by it. Most of the emotion I've felt lately has been empathy for my mother and sisters over this whole fiasco; I've been more indifferent. I'm going out of town with friends for a week later this month, and I'm hoping I can cool off then.

Originally Posted by PizzaNazi

But seriously, people that are suicidal apparently have this ongoing mental "congress', where they are constantly weighing pros and cons. So, seek out the pros of life and keep those on the forefront of your mind. Could you really kill yourself after enjoying a juicy, old-fashioned style bacon cheeseburger? Or how about an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm or something equally funny?

Larry David =

[DJ Meaty Cheeks]

Fuck 'god', fuck him in the ass with a giant rubber dick.