Zoklet.net

Go Back   Zoklet.net > General > Generally Speaking

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 02-08-2012, 01:41 PM
HelloClarice's Avatar
HelloClarice HelloClarice is offline
Duke
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Florida
Thanks: 1,903
Thanked 1,543 Times in 1,080 Posts
Default calling in sick to work

what are some excuses you've used to do this?
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 02-08-2012, 02:08 PM
WeezyJ WeezyJ is offline
Wealthy Merchant
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Thanks: 78
Thanked 46 Times in 37 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

just say diahrea. they won't question it, works every time.
Reply With Quote
The following users say "It is so good to hear it!":
Nein Cat (02-08-2012)
  #3  
Old 02-08-2012, 02:52 PM
Illegal Immigrant's Avatar
Illegal Immigrant Illegal Immigrant is offline
Marquis
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Miami Florida
Thanks: 116
Thanked 259 Times in 193 Posts
Send a message via AIM to Illegal Immigrant
Thumbs Up Re: calling in sick to work

if you lay on your bed on your back and hang your head down off the side of the bed so your neck is bent backwards and your head is upside down. then when you talk on the phone and it sounds like you have a sore throat.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 02-08-2012, 02:54 PM
HelloClarice's Avatar
HelloClarice HelloClarice is offline
Duke
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Florida
Thanks: 1,903
Thanked 1,543 Times in 1,080 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chemical Intercourse View Post
if you lay on your bed on your back and hang your head down off the side of the bed so your neck is bent backwards and your head is upside down. then when you talk on the phone and it sounds like you have a sore throat.

does that really work? i'm going to try it one day.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 02-08-2012, 03:57 PM
felonious_monk's Avatar
felonious_monk felonious_monk is offline
Archduke
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Thanks: 685
Thanked 920 Times in 648 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

when you call in sick to work often it lowers your managers respect for you and makes your job harder. just a helpful hint. if ur the guy who never calls in or asks for days off last minute u can get away with a lot more and u will always have priority compared to ur idiot co workers who can't figure out why their manager hates them
__________________
Hayley Williamz
Reply With Quote
The following users say "It is so good to hear it!":
Nein Cat (02-08-2012)
  #6  
Old 02-08-2012, 04:04 PM
HelloClarice's Avatar
HelloClarice HelloClarice is offline
Duke
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Florida
Thanks: 1,903
Thanked 1,543 Times in 1,080 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

i'm not trying to call in sick. just curious about some of the excuses others use. especially if they are lulzy
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 02-08-2012, 04:37 PM
arleybob's Avatar
arleybob arleybob is offline
The Belbet Bog
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: the saddest city in the world
Thanks: 2,762
Thanked 1,833 Times in 1,339 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

my job is awesome. i figured out that i can email in sick instead of calling. definitely saves me some hassle.
__________________
Arley, the quote in your signature sucks and is gross....You need to change it. Sorry man, but it's the truth. I'm not dissing you personally either, just the quote. - Infrared
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 02-09-2012, 06:56 AM
SBTlauien's Avatar
SBTlauien SBTlauien is online now
Archduke
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Places
Thanks: 630
Thanked 441 Times in 338 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

I use to just call in a say I'm sick in a normal voice, no acting. But at my last real job there was an automated number that made it easy(I still got in trouble for calling in everytime I had a full sick day...they caught on to the pattern...BS IMO).

They really can't do much if you do it like every two months when you have a full sick day. Unless they are uptight about it like Lowe's.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 02-09-2012, 07:01 AM
arleybob's Avatar
arleybob arleybob is offline
The Belbet Bog
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: the saddest city in the world
Thanks: 2,762
Thanked 1,833 Times in 1,339 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

at my job, the rule is if you're gonna call in sick three days in a row, a doctor's note is preferred. not even required.

they won't fire you at this place unless you're a balls to the wall maniac. i swear.
__________________
Arley, the quote in your signature sucks and is gross....You need to change it. Sorry man, but it's the truth. I'm not dissing you personally either, just the quote. - Infrared
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 02-09-2012, 07:02 AM
pill popper's Avatar
pill popper pill popper is offline
Grander Duke
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Hongcouver
Thanks: 297
Thanked 599 Times in 478 Posts
Send a message via MSN to pill popper
Default Re: calling in sick to work

Quote:
Originally Posted by jkearley421 View Post
just say diahrea. they won't question it, works every time.
Fucking this . I mean how can they argue it
Do they really want you at work sweating and groaning in pain and running to and from the can .
__________________
Mizled will be the death of Cocklet. Bring back wires
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 02-09-2012, 07:03 AM
arleybob's Avatar
arleybob arleybob is offline
The Belbet Bog
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: the saddest city in the world
Thanks: 2,762
Thanked 1,833 Times in 1,339 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

one time i said i had an STD and needed time alone

another time i said my uncle killed himself (that was true) but i didn't care, i just used it to my own advantage
__________________
Arley, the quote in your signature sucks and is gross....You need to change it. Sorry man, but it's the truth. I'm not dissing you personally either, just the quote. - Infrared
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 02-09-2012, 07:22 AM
Tom_Riddle Tom_Riddle is offline
Serf
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

generally the more embarrassing the excuse, the less questions they ask...it's a combination of your boss not giving a shit, and being too disgusted to want to give a shit
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 02-09-2012, 07:45 AM
arleybob's Avatar
arleybob arleybob is offline
The Belbet Bog
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: the saddest city in the world
Thanks: 2,762
Thanked 1,833 Times in 1,339 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

lately i've just been saying i'm an insomniac and haven't been getting any sleep
__________________
Arley, the quote in your signature sucks and is gross....You need to change it. Sorry man, but it's the truth. I'm not dissing you personally either, just the quote. - Infrared
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 02-09-2012, 09:47 AM
pill popper's Avatar
pill popper pill popper is offline
Grander Duke
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Hongcouver
Thanks: 297
Thanked 599 Times in 478 Posts
Send a message via MSN to pill popper
Default Re: calling in sick to work

Quote:
Originally Posted by arleybob View Post
one time i said i had an STD and needed time alone

another time i said my uncle killed himself (that was true) but i didn't care, i just used it to my own advantage
Well here you are entitled to five paid days of bereavement . if that was true you'd have been paid forthe time off
__________________
Mizled will be the death of Cocklet. Bring back wires
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 02-09-2012, 09:57 AM
BITCH TITZ BITCH TITZ is offline
Drunk Motherfucker
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: phx
Thanks: 511
Thanked 927 Times in 654 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

just let them know you're sick and can't work that day. last few jobs i've had kept an attendance point system, so they didn't give a fuck what your excuse was.

6 points in a 3 month period you're fired. call in was 1.5 points, no call no show 3 points, late <hr .5 points.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 02-09-2012, 08:42 PM
Unwyred's Avatar
Unwyred Unwyred is offline
Kemst hgt fari.
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Alfheim
Thanks: 2,933
Thanked 2,853 Times in 1,907 Posts
Arrow Re: calling in sick to work

I keep a small book that I write things down in. One of the things I keep track of are my excuses for calling off work. Here follows a brief excerpt from said list:
  • "My groin region is covered in poison ivy. Don't ask how, it's personal, embarrassing, and painful."
  • "A distant relative in Nigeria passed away and has left me a large sum of money. I need to meet with the lawyers today as they verify the will."
  • "The water main under my house broke and there are salmon everywhere for some reason."
  • "I ate too much table salt last night and am having severe cramps."
  • "My parakeet died. I'm giving him a Viking funeral"
  • "I had a date with Ashley in the photo lab last night, but I stood her up, telling her I was really sick. I need you to cover for my lie and give me the day off."
  • "I'm Jewish, I need the week off for Channukah"
  • "I'm Hindu, I need the day off for Diwali."
  • "I'm trying to resurrect my parakeet. Satan commands I sacrifice a goat today."
  • "I'm doing laundry today."
  • "I need to sexually harass my neighbor today."
  • "Have you been outside? It's much too pretty to work today."
  • "I quit. I'll see you next week."
  • "My dog is shitting everywhere. I think she's possessed by a shit demon."
  • "IHOP is having their endless stack of pancakes promo. I'm going to try to start a lawsuit."
  • "I was bit by a salamander."
  • "The jackolopes are looking for me. I can't risk them finding me at work."
__________________
We've got ACRES of land!
"Prepare to write down the recipe!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by fuckhead View Post
YOU ARE MY HERO

- peace out
Reply With Quote
The following users say "It is so good to hear it!":
HelloClarice (02-10-2012)
  #17  
Old 02-10-2012, 12:30 AM
Morb's Avatar
Morb Morb is offline
Slightly Grander Duke
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Camelot, it is a silly place.
Thanks: 292
Thanked 793 Times in 567 Posts
Thumbs Up Re: calling in sick to work

*Goes into phone voice:*

"Hi Bob, yeah, it's me. Um, yeah, I can't make it into work today. Yeah. Turns out I have a bleeding ulcer from trying to come up with new excuses not to show up. Yeah... what's that? Oh, yeah, I have a note from the doctor. Yeah, believe it or not, I'm not fucking around this time, I really could die. What's that? Yeah, poetic justice, funny. Good one, Bob. See ya Monday, okay, yeah."

That one only works if you have a really cool boss named Bob.
Reply With Quote
The following users say "It is so good to hear it!":
HelloClarice (02-10-2012)
  #18  
Old 02-10-2012, 01:39 AM
Illegal Immigrant's Avatar
Illegal Immigrant Illegal Immigrant is offline
Marquis
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Miami Florida
Thanks: 116
Thanked 259 Times in 193 Posts
Send a message via AIM to Illegal Immigrant
Mad Re: calling in sick to work

Quote:
Originally Posted by helloclarice View Post
does that really work? I'm going to try it one day.
of course it works dude what the fuck !?
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 02-10-2012, 01:45 AM
HelloClarice's Avatar
HelloClarice HelloClarice is offline
Duke
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Florida
Thanks: 1,903
Thanked 1,543 Times in 1,080 Posts
Default Re: calling in sick to work

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chemical Intercourse View Post
of course it works dude what the fuck !?
no i believe you. i was thinking about it the same way i would think about curing hiccups, some of those methods don't work.
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 02-10-2012, 03:45 AM
pill popper's Avatar
pill popper pill popper is offline
Grander Duke
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Hongcouver
Thanks: 297
Thanked 599 Times in 478 Posts
Send a message via MSN to pill popper
Default Re: calling in sick to work

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unwyred View Post
I keep a small book that I write things down in. One of the things I keep track of are my excuses for calling off work. Here follows a brief excerpt from said list: [list][*]"My groin region is covered in poison ivy. Don't ask how, it's personal, embarrassing, and painful."
Only question for you and I love the excuse by the way

How in the fuck could this happen LOL

We have to ask and get this in writing because of our union

I swear I'd die laughing seeing a written reason for that happening
__________________
Mizled will be the death of Cocklet. Bring back wires
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
calling, sick, work

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Calling off work to get drunk T.K. Baha Better Living Through Chemistry 14 04-22-2010 08:50 PM
i'm sick as balls and i have to get up at 545 to be at work PROJECT PAT Bat Country 8 02-17-2010 03:54 AM
I called in sick for work today Comrade Jokke Bat Country 9 02-04-2010 11:03 AM
ITT: Excuses for me calling in sick to work. jiz Bat Country 11 01-10-2010 07:25 PM
Is it stupid to work out when you're sick? Nero Carved Outta Wood 19 10-06-2009 12:43 PM


All times are GMT. The time now is 07:08 AM.


Hot Topics
Join our Chatroom!
Users: 8
Messages/minute: 0
Topic: "Only rule: be nice or I'll cut your fucking face off, dumbshit"
Users: 27
Messages/minute: 1.6
Topic: "http://codelove.org :: Below is above in 2 codes 1 love. :: wh..."
Users: 18
Messages/minute: 5
Topic: "http://www.literotica...."
Advertisements
Your ad could go right HERE! Contact us!

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.