I do, I do! I fucking lurv them... I think. I... yeah. I love them. My feeling towards amphetamines are mixed. Love/hate, but mostly love. I just get annoyed that I don't necessarily feel energetic every time I dose. Sometimes I get stimmed up and jumpy like I imagine I should, but a lot of the time amphetamines just sap all my strength and leave me feeling cheated. Which is bullshit.
At least 60% of the time I feel physically exhausted after doing a line or popping a pill; like all my muscles have gone weak or become relaxed. It doesn't make me tired - I'll definitely be feeling more refreshed and awake - but it doesn't make me speedy.
... does that mean I have ADD or some shit? I'm pretty sure I've heard before (both here and on other sites) that feeling tired/weak on speed is a semi-reliable indicator of ADD. Shit. If that were the case doctors would just give you an amphetamine or some shit and see how you react as a diagnostic aid for ADD, wouldn't they? Too amped to sit in one place means the patient has no ADD! RIGHT? Surely it's a myth then?
Man... it just sucks. Fuck. I'll have the confidence to howl at the moon or sing a song loud and proud, but when I try to do it I end up struggling to be any louder than my regular voice is. It's like my diaphragm (maybe? anatomy isn't my forté) gets too relaxed to push the desired volume of air out of me at the pressure needed to produce sounds at the volume I want.
Gah, fucking amphetamines. Does anyone have any reliable ways to counter what I view as a paradoxical reaction to amphetamine type drugs? I've been considering drinking coffee when I'm pseudo-tweaking like that. I figure I'll go put a pot on after I post this, but I'm wondering if there are any other options to combat the 'relaxation' I feel sometimes.