we can still be friends, right?

[HelloClarice]

some of you have probably heard this question after a breakup. has it worked out for you or do you think its impossible to be friends with an ex?

discuss.

[bleh]

It's almost always awkward.

[The Duke]

I'm friends with a lot of exes but not like SUPER good friends, just mostly chat on facebook type thing.

[HelloClarice]

yeah that's how i feel about it too. there's usually way too much baggage that gets in the way.

edit: that was meant for bleh. but it's true, the only exes i'm friends with are the ones i only see once in a while or talk to on Facebook

[The Pat-Man]

fuck yea i used to be serious with one of my best friends til I broke it off, although to be fair we still get it on every now and then. shes just an awesome person though, we'd be friends in any situation.

[Jojoman]

i came into this thread to tell you no; my argument: why bother

[Vargus]

It's not awkward for me, but it's not easy either. She is still my best friend, but she wanted to stop talking until I was able to get over my feelings for her. Pretty stupid on her part since she was thinking it was hurting me to still talk. I've been ready to move past her for some time, but there is nowhere to go.

But now that we've stopped talking for a while I've started to get really resentful towards her, and it's especially going to come out if and when she is going to whine about never having a successful relationship. Well fuck me running girl, I was willing to make it work and provide a life for you and you didn't even want to try. It makes a little more sense when you realize she is effectively a shut-in who is losing a lot of her good friends because they are finding their own ways without her.

I don't know how it's going to work being friends, because I'm not going to get over her, and she still needs me a lot as a friend. It's just endlessly frustrating seeing her wallow around alone and then not take the opportunity to make due with someone who, for once in her life, loves to be around and listen to her and wasn't going to treat her like shit and leave, and who she cares for and feels secure with. Then I have to deal with thoughts of me finding someone and it working out and watching her be jealous (which she told me she would be). My same response applies. Of course I'm not worried about that, it's just a frustration I'm inevitably going to have to face.

God dammit. God Dammit. God dammit.

It's going to be a strain on everything, and will likely end very badly either for me or her. I'm either going to get carried away with my life and slowly lose touch, or watching her suffer is going to kill my relationships. The logical response is to not be friends, but I don't have it in me because it's going to so bad for her. Hell, I'm the person she calls at night to talk to when none of her other "friends" want to listen. Yea, she would lose it and I would feel responsible.

Fuck.

[Blunderstar]

Originally Posted by HelloClarice

some of you have probably heard this question after a breakup. has it worked out for you or do you think its impossible to be friends with an ex?

discuss.

Haven't you ever seen Seinfeld you fucking stupid bitch?

[Pee Vee Proots, M.D.]

We break up and I cut 'em out of my life entirely. It's probably easier for everyone that way, but even if it's only easier for me... it's a good policy. Women I've already fucked and/or loved aren't worth keeping around for friendship material. I'd rather be alone than deal with some bitch I used to love whining about her problems.

[Usama Bin Laden]

If it happens it happens, if it doesn't it doesn't. The real key is to force nothing.

Vargas, cut and run. It'll be worse not to in the long run... Lesser of two evils and such. Eventually the built-up resentments will probably kill the friendship entirely if you don't. Slow, agonizing death.

[Usama Bin Laden]

OP: I think whatever happens, happens. Force nothing, and just see where the winds take things.

Vargas, I think it's time to cut and run. Your friendship seems to be well on the way to a slow, agonizing death. At this point the lesser of two evils seems to be to end it quick and hard. Sometimes you have to hack off the wounded limb before it festers and kills you...

[Mantikore]

100% of the time I am friends with them beforehand, and i find it easy to go back.

[Vox Ducis]

When it's over, it means something has failed in the relationship. There's no reason to be friend with an ex, if not for showing people you're not mad about it. It's just hypocrisy.

[ObscuredByClouds]

Damn Vargus you bein played for a fool brah!

She doesn't want you because you give her so much attention. You're her 'snuggle bitch'. She calls you whenever she feels bad about fucking a random guy at a club. She calls you and tells you just how lonely and miserable she is. You are her 'emotional tampon'.

In short, you're a bitch. No offense, I didn't mean that in an insulting way. Just in the way that YOU ARE BEING USED. Do you really want that? Do you really want to hear about her boy problems?

If you really want her back, do this. Tell her exactly what you told us. Be HONEST. One day, casually, repeat CASUALLY bring it up in conversation. Do not make it seem like you have been thinking about what to say or how to say it for days beforehand (even though it's true). You want to seem like it's just something you noticed and want to CASUALLY bring it up. Wait until she complains about a boy and then begin the process of getting her back by saying:

Hey you know, I don't know how it's going to work being friends, because I'm not going to get over you, and you obviously still need me a lot as a friend. It's just endlessly frustrating seeing you wallow around alone and then not take the opportunity to make due with someone who loves to be around and listen to you and wasn't going to treat you like shit and leave, and who you care for and feels secure with. I was willing to make it work and provide a life for you and you didn't even want to try. Sorry but I don't think we can hang out as much as we are now.

Now wait until what she says, she will probably say something like:

'Wha..What do you mean?'

Do NOT BACK DOWN. This is her defense mechanism at play here. She is going to make it seem like YOU are abandoning HER, when really this whole time SHE has been the one casting YOU aside. This is your moment to repeat what you said, maybe reworded. Just basically tell her straight up how you feel, HONESTY IS KEY. Fucking trust me on this one. There is nothing more simple and easy than just being honest.

But don't bitch out and start pouring your heart out on the table. That shit's kinda gay. Just state that you were willing to make something happen and she didn't want it. Now you want to move on and would like some space please.

Now you need to start living life for yourself. Find a hobby. Learn a new instrument, go to the gym, buy a new car, something, anything that is YOU DOING STUFF FOR YOU. Live your life how you want to live it, and fuck what other people think. If she calls you in the middle of the night to cry about a fuck she regretted, don't answer. Don't even pick up the phone. Fuck it, you're sleeping, why should you sacrifice your sleep time to listen to her whine about boys? She has, or needs to find, GIRL friends for that kind of shit.

And as you continue on not giving a fuck and living your life how you want to, she will realize that she's not on your list of priorities anymore and will probably reconsider dumping you. But at that time you probably won't even want her anymore, and will have found a new, better girl who actually cares about you for just being yourself.

No guarantee with this working for you and her, but AT THE VERY LEAST you will be rid of a negative situation and be working on making yourself who you want to be. It's really impossible to fail here.

Good luck bra may the force be with you

[broseph]

unless you're both happy to be having sex with each other out of the relationship; no. and even then, only in some cases.

feelings and frustrations will get it the way if you're just trying to be platonic.

[HelloClarice]

Originally Posted by Blunderstar

Haven't you ever seen Seinfeld you fucking stupid bitch?

many times, you aspie fuck. if you don't want to contribute you're more than welcome to take your rants and TV quotes back to PEOO where they belong.

[vovka351]

upon hearing this phrase, one should immediately revert to a cunt punt.

[Malcolm Equis]

i say i dont wanna be friends than walk away

[King of the world]

Originally Posted by HelloClarice

many times, you aspie fuck. if you don't want to contribute you're more than welcome to take your rants and TV quotes back to PEOO where they belong.

Oooooo, someone's on the rag.

[HelloClarice]

Originally Posted by King of the world

Oooooo, someone's on the rag.

nah, just not in the mood to ignore faggotry like i normally do.

[The Big LeBronowski]

nope, too awkward

[King of the world]

Damn you women and your crazy emotions

As for the thread, I'm 'friends' with like 2 of my exes, by that I mean I'm civil whenever I bump into them, no need to be an aspie and make it awkward like most of you fucks here. The rest of them I flat out ignore, they fucking hate it when I do that.

[HelloClarice]

^^^^ yeah, exactly. i have no problems being civil, or having an every once in a while conversation with most of them but as far as being close friends? no way. you broke up for a reason and unless it was no big deal or a mutual decision that reason will be the elephant in the room all the time.

[southernsun]

I'm friends with a few ex's and we still get on, even more so when we see each other out on the town and are both drunk, we usually end up fucking like dogs down some alleyway before going back to the bar, classy.

[NamelessNom4d]

yeah it takes a long time before it's not awkward anymore and you're still not as close as you once were in my experience anyway

[adhesive tape]

A girl I used to date tried to say this stupid bullshit after we had broken up for like the third time. I told her that I have no interest in being her friend, I don't want to see her or hear from her. I told to pretend like we never met. The only time I want to be reminded of you is when you call me once every 3-4 months to tell me that you are alive, that's it. The only other time I pick up her calls or answer her texts is when its a booty call and she decides to cheat on whatever boyfriend she has now. It works out pretty well actually, I should beat that pussy up this weekend...

[p6867]

A lot of girls I dated in high school hung out and still hang out with my circle of friends, none of them were super serious though. There's a huge difference between some chick you dated for a few months and someone you're with for a few years and you're building a life together. If me and my girlfriend broke up, there's no way we could hang out socially.

[jackiesbaby]

In my experience, it's possible to be friends with an ex once neither of you have any feelings for each other at all whatsoever. If one of you still wants the other, it's just going to be shitty and awkward.

[ChinaCat]

Well if you went out to begin with youmobviously have potential to be friends, whether it can work out that way

Just like sometimes someone youre friends with can have the potential to be romantic

It just depends on how it works out its not mutually exclusive

[lillix]

I do pretty well keeping in touch with all but two ex's... mostly just because they're not the element I need in my life right now. Everyone else and I are cool... there's some tension and weird moments sometimes, but I think for the most part we're all fairly mature adults and can act as such.

[ChinaCat]

Originally Posted by lillix

I do pretty well keeping in touch with all but two ex's... mostly just because they're not the element I need in my life right now. Everyone else and I are cool... there's some tension and weird moments sometimes, but I think for the most part we're all fairly mature adults and can act as such.

This is how i feel

[Malcolm Equis]

she gets jelly espeically when im flirting with her friend

[Tinted Glass]

Guys that I dated exclusively, but only briefly, we keep in touch from time to time and we are civil.

The ones that I actually loved, I don't have anything to do with. If I loved someone, it took something pretty fucked up to break us up, and I have no interest in friendship because there's always a chance it can lead us back to romantic involvement, and I have no interest in that shit.

[LavaRed]

No. I've explicitly told all of my ex's that I'm not interested in being friends. Being friends means you inherit al of the obligations, but none of the benefits of being in a relationship.

I sincerely believe that it is not possible for disinterested friendship to exist betwen persons of opposite sexes.

[MrSinister]

Originally Posted by HelloClarice

some of you have probably heard this question after a breakup. has it worked out for you or do you think its impossible to be friends with an ex?

discuss.

Im good friends with an ex of mine. Although we see/talk less now that we're seeing other people. But I know that if either of us really needed each other (as friends) we'd be there for the other person in a heartbeat.

We were friends before we got together and broke up at a point to preserve the friendship.

[General Butt.Naked]

AlL my exes linve in Texas.

So texcas is the place.....to goo










































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*ahem*

...tto go if you want a free blowjo b and some weird bum,ops on your dick.

E: No/ .Unless you broke up ojjm like the best term,s ever, this NEVRE works..

[psychomanthis]

My answer to that question is always no.

[Carrollizer]

Girlfriend asking to be friends after breaking up. Would be basically the same as me running over her dog and saying, "oh I killed your dog, but you can keep it"