Mind: Partner pressuring me into therapy.

[whatbpmscareshorses?]

I've been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder since I was sixteen, and a tentative Bipolar type II diagnoses followed a year later (although I personally feel it would no longer stand.)
It goes without saying that it affects my relationship, and in the past it has caused some conflict between my boyfriend and I. Around eight months ago he gave me an ultimatum - either go and see a psychologist or he would leave.
In the time since then I have been financially unable to do so, but have made significant progress and change to my own behavioral patterns because I don't have a lot of faith in the mental health system here and didn't want to see a psychologist.

Last week he commented on my progress, and told me I had improved so much and that he was proud of me. Yesterday I had a free appointment I was able to get with a psychologist I had previously seen, and didn't go. The thought of seeing someone again makes me sick and anxious, and I felt that I had enough of a handle on my own emotional stability and didn't necessarily "need" to go.
When I told him that though, he pulled the "I will have to have a serious think about whether I can still be with you or not" line, despite telling me not even a week ago how much I had improved and how much happier he was lately. We aren't fighting with any regularity and up until I told him I hadn't gone to my appointment, everything was fine with us.

I feel like he thinks that it's going to be some miracle cure to all the issues in our relationship, even completely normal run of the mill couple issues, and he blames a lot of our problems on my mental health.
I don't know what to do or how to handle the situation.

Has anyone else ever faced a similar situation? and how did you explain to your partner that forcing you into seeing a psychologist wasn't going to help if you genuinely didn't want to be there and realistically didn't have much reason to be?

[Rust]

Bump. Was unapproved.

[Proots]

Maybe you are really improving, though - whether you think so or not. It's a tough situation, but you have to ask yourself how devoted you are to this man and whether or not you trust him.

If you trust him - then, trust that he wants what's best for you. It's not so much that he thinks it's a miracle cure (well, he might, I don't know the guy) but, he might just want you to at least make an effort to tackle your illness.

You need to ask yourself this : what is the relationship worth? Is it worth you going to see somebody every now and then, despite the fact you don't need to? Are you committed enough for that?

If you're not willing to see somebody and genuinely feel you don't need to - then, simply be up front and honest with him about it and let the chips fall where they may.

[HampTheToker]

So, are you single yet?

I like women with mental issues.

[Struwwelpeter]

Originally Posted by HampTheToker

So, are you single yet?

I like women with mental issues.

Yeah, because you like to prey on the weak, fucking pervert.

[Bradley]

Originally Posted by Jim "fuck latinos" Carrey

Yeah, because you like to prey on the weak, fucking pervert.

I was about to say this.

[Ethan]

Maybe he's looking for an excuse to leave. Sorry. Odds are he makes the same mistakes over and over, just like everyone else. So don't feel bad.

[ShutMeUp]

yes, I have been in that situation. exactly that situation. your partner needs to realise that there are other underlying issues in your relationship that need to be noticed and worked on, while you are taking care of yourself. explain to him that you know your own mind, what you are feeling, and know when you need to speak to somebody. tell him you feel pressure from him and he's not being supportive.

it sounds like he's very frustrated with the relationship and it's likely that since your mental health issues are in the open he's hoping if they're "fixed" then the relationship will be "how it was". I got this treatment a LOT from my ex, and my advice to you is the moment you feel your partner is forcing you, pressuring you, or making your decisions for you: leave.

PM me if you like, I'm usually around.

[reggie_love]

Originally Posted by Jim "fuck latinos" Carrey

Yeah, because you like to prey on the weak, fucking pervert.

Lol, borderline chicks will eat a man alive. At least, that was my experience.

[Trix Are For Kids]

Originally Posted by ShutMeUp

yes, I have been in that situation. exactly that situation. your partner needs to realise that there are other underlying issues in your relationship that need to be noticed and worked on, while you are taking care of yourself. explain to him that you know your own mind, what you are feeling, and know when you need to speak to somebody. tell him you feel pressure from him and he's not being supportive.

it sounds like he's very frustrated with the relationship and it's likely that since your mental health issues are in the open he's hoping if they're "fixed" then the relationship will be "how it was". I got this treatment a LOT from my ex, and my advice to you is the moment you feel your partner is forcing you, pressuring you, or making your decisions for you: leave.

PM me if you like, I'm usually around.

You fucking crazy cunt this is exactly why only professionals should give advice. YOU ARE THE ONE WHO DROVE YOUR PARTNER AWAY. THEY DIDN'T PRESSURE YOU INTO ANYTHING YOU DIDN'T WANT; YOU WERE JUST FUCKING INSANE!

Wish I could tell the guy to bail while he still can.

[reggie_love]

^ My education and intellectual faculties tell me not to press the "thanks" button, but my memory says "FUCKING DO IT!"

I'm in quite the pickle.

[ShutMeUp]

Originally Posted by Trix Are For Kids

You fucking crazy cunt this is exactly why only professionals should give advice. YOU ARE THE ONE WHO DROVE YOUR PARTNER AWAY. THEY DIDN'T PRESSURE YOU INTO ANYTHING YOU DIDN'T WANT; YOU WERE JUST FUCKING INSANE!

Wish I could tell the guy to bail while he still can.

FYI - I left my partner, not the other way around, for many reasons, one being he was a dumb fucking teenage dicksucker not unlike yourself

how can you say that this:

Originally Posted by whatbpmscareshorses?

I've been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder since I was sixteen, and a tentative Bipolar type II diagnoses followed a year later (although I personally feel it would no longer stand.)
It goes without saying that it affects my relationship, and in the past it has caused some conflict between my boyfriend and I. Around eight months ago he gave me an ultimatum - either go and see a psychologist or he would leave.

or this:

Originally Posted by whatbpmscareshorses?

Last week he commented on my progress, and told me I had improved so much and that he was proud of me. Yesterday I had a free appointment I was able to get with a psychologist I had previously seen, and didn't go. The thought of seeing someone again makes me sick and anxious, and I felt that I had enough of a handle on my own emotional stability and didn't necessarily "need" to go.
When I told him that though, he pulled the "I will have to have a serious think about whether I can still be with you or not" line, despite telling me not even a week ago how much I had improved and how much happier he was lately. We aren't fighting with any regularity and up until I told him I hadn't gone to my appointment, everything was fine with us.

isn't pressuring? stfu

[The Duke]

Is there not some sort of free clinic you could go to? Or some sort of sliding scale facility? I've been to all kind of head doctors and the only one that really helped me was a therapist.

Talking issues out to a complete stranger is incredibly cathartic and it helps to get a perspective from somebody not involved with you personally to help evaluate your life and the choices you're making.

SMU: Get off the rag already, you've been a superbitch the last few days, we're over it.

[1983]

What the fuck is this with all these single post mud farmers popping up? Fucking insane shit or the FBI just got another cash injection.

Al

[Rodrat]

I hate the word partner so much. I only here it from gay people. So I'm assuming your a man? If so buck up and go to the damn doctor.

[-Fuck-]

Originally Posted by whatbpmscareshorses?

I've been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder since I was sixteen, and a tentative Bipolar type II diagnoses followed a year later (although I personally feel it would no longer stand.)

Dramatic Look - YouTube

Dramatic Look - YouTube
Video: click to display

Joking aside (I want this vid to be popular standard response on zoklet) I used to think I was so fucking perfect and constantly told my girlfriend she had issues and better "grow up" and "shape up", she was annoying, she slept with a lot of other guys and she was only my second gf, but you know what? I fucked everything up and she's gone now because I pushed her away and is never coming back. She even called me weeks after our final breakup and I told her no, it was just too much I felt like everyone wanted her and it tore me up... She had 2 kids since then, moved and is with her family in another state, and it sucks to realize all those other guys split on her after some one night stands and I threw her away, she never wanted to let me go.

The sad part is one of those kids is one of my friends who immediately split on her and his son (I mean he WAS only 16), and another one of my friends was exclaiming "how good it felt to bust a nut inside of a girl who is pregnant and you cant get her pregnant again" soon after... So I mean, it's not like my worst nightmares happened after I left her, but I seriously wonder if I had stayed with her would they have? Because those friends are long gone now... and I cant help but feel she was the type of girl that as long as you loved her, she wouldnt go after total shitheads for love that you couldnt give her.

I cant help but feel she was one of a kind (I will be with others but its not HER and ME you know?) and miss her and everything I put her through because she was a bit nutty herself. Like, you dont really realize how fast years can go on and you might have had something good but you'd never know because you threw it all away, and it doesnt even hit you until years later either when you meet others and they're just not "her". All I can say is women are very sexually powerful, you've got to be careful in an instant you can make a guy cum and make it feel like youre smothering and draining him literally. I think being unable to deal with this is why most guys need to tell their woman off or insult her and keep her "in check" because otherwise, every sexual experience would be a new baby.

Looking back, I wish Id handled things differently and was more mature as a man to understand relationships and tantric sexuality. I'd never thought of it and was in the thrill of everything... Maybe just chill out and find a hobby when he's not around like a guitar or something. I dont think therapy or drugs can solve anything personally, but I think if most men had a tantric outlook towards sex, they'd feel different, I know I would have never left her, even if she cheated or I did down the line, I think we would have fought but we would have HAD EACH OTHER at the end of the night, and looking back on the convos I feel like such a selfish complete dick like I was her father or something...I would always break up with her or tell her off and she would always come back and never wanted to be away from me.

Just take it easy on him, find something to do with your time to balance yourself out, and be glad you have someone. You dont know how quickly something great can be thrown away and never come back...