friends with benefits is the ideal relationship

[aquabania]

prove me wrong

[ObscuredByClouds]

For a while, yes, yes it is. Then you start feeling more attached and begin to feel jealous that she could be potentially fucking other guys too. Then when you're not with her you spend your nights lying awake wondering how many cocks she has in her mouth right now, and even though you don't want to think about, you are kept awake tormented by the thought of numerous throbbing cocks thrusting in and out of her soft pink vagina, the one that you should have all to yourself. No, it's not true, she's not a slut! you tell yourself, wishing and praying that you two are exclusive. Next time you see her and fuck her you realize that you are indirectly fucking those other dudes who penetrated her last night while you were at home whacking off to free porn. Then you realize that you're just being used for sex by a huge fucking slut, and although you may try to tell yourself that you're somehow special, you know deep down that you are just being used, only to be thrown away when something better comes along (like a real man who she wants a relationship with). Yes, you are nothing but a method for her to maintain her sexual sanity while she searches for a suitable mate (read: not you).

Go ahead and tell yourself it's the best. You are fooling no one, not even yourself.

[SoulButter]

/thread

[Dfg]

Originally Posted by ObscuredByClouds

For a while, yes, yes it is. Then you start feeling more attached and begin to feel jealous that she could be potentially fucking other guys too. Then when you're not with her you spend your nights lying awake wondering how many cocks she has in her mouth right now, and even though you don't want to think about, you are kept awake tormented by the thought of numerous throbbing cocks thrusting in and out of her soft pink vagina, the one that you should have all to yourself. No, it's not true, she's not a slut! you tell yourself, wishing and praying that you two are exclusive. Next time you see her and fuck her you realize that you are indirectly fucking those other dudes who penetrated her last night while you were at home whacking off to free porn. Then you realize that you're just being used for sex by a huge fucking slut, and although you may try to tell yourself that you're somehow special, you know deep down that you are just being used, only to be thrown away when something better comes along (like a real man who she wants a relationship with). Yes, you are nothing but a method for her to maintain her sexual sanity while she searches for a suitable mate (read: not you).

Go ahead and tell yourself it's the best. You are fooling no one, not even yourself.

TRUTH

[ObscuredByClouds]

Originally Posted by Fox Paws

You're projecting so hard right now

You learn by experience bro

[A$AP Weed Smoker]

imo the best relationship is like a tier above fwb. light, fun, no titles, no drama, low accountability.. just enjoying the company of another person for what it is.

lol who cares if she's getting fucked by someone else. the minute you throw a title on things you do.

[HelloClarice]

Originally Posted by SoulButter

/thread

QFT. Obscured nailed it exactly.

[Vizier]

Originally Posted by ObscuredByClouds

For a while, yes, yes it is. Then you start feeling more attached and begin to feel jealous that she could be potentially fucking other guys too. Then when you're not with her you spend your nights lying awake wondering how many cocks she has in her mouth right now, and even though you don't want to think about, you are kept awake tormented by the thought of numerous throbbing cocks thrusting in and out of her soft pink vagina, the one that you should have all to yourself. No, it's not true, she's not a slut! you tell yourself, wishing and praying that you two are exclusive. Next time you see her and fuck her you realize that you are indirectly fucking those other dudes who penetrated her last night while you were at home whacking off to free porn. Then you realize that you're just being used for sex by a huge fucking slut, and although you may try to tell yourself that you're somehow special, you know deep down that you are just being used, only to be thrown away when something better comes along (like a real man who she wants a relationship with). Yes, you are nothing but a method for her to maintain her sexual sanity while she searches for a suitable mate (read: not you).

Go ahead and tell yourself it's the best. You are fooling no one, not even yourself.

123

[aquabania]

Originally Posted by ObscuredByClouds

For a while, yes, yes it is. Then you start feeling more attached and begin to feel jealous that she could be potentially fucking other guys too. Then when you're not with her you spend your nights lying awake wondering how many cocks she has in her mouth right now, and even though you don't want to think about, you are kept awake tormented by the thought of numerous throbbing cocks thrusting in and out of her soft pink vagina, the one that you should have all to yourself. No, it's not true, she's not a slut! you tell yourself, wishing and praying that you two are exclusive. Next time you see her and fuck her you realize that you are indirectly fucking those other dudes who penetrated her last night while you were at home whacking off to free porn. Then you realize that you're just being used for sex by a huge fucking slut, and although you may try to tell yourself that you're somehow special, you know deep down that you are just being used, only to be thrown away when something better comes along (like a real man who she wants a relationship with). Yes, you are nothing but a method for her to maintain her sexual sanity while she searches for a suitable mate (read: not you).

Go ahead and tell yourself it's the best. You are fooling no one, not even yourself.

ehhhhh i've been getting with this girl for like 5 months at this point? and she's fucked plenty of other of dudes in that time. and it's like, i'll admit i prefer she didn't, but it's a small price to pay for the stress and drama free thing we have. but there's some truth to what you're saying. it's not the perfect derangement. but i'll take it over pretty much any of the alternatives

[aquabania]

Originally Posted by Weed Smoker

imo the best relationship is like a tier above fwb. light, fun, no titles, no drama, low accountability.. just enjoying the company of another person for what it is.

lol who cares if she's getting fucked by someone else. the minute you throw a title on things you do.

yeeeah that's pretty much where im at right now

[888]

Until you get a disease or knock some whore up and she doesnt know who's it is and you end up paying child support ..

[Miley Highrus]

I'd have to agree since I generally hate people.

[Daily]

Originally Posted by Dfg

TRUTH

Have you had sex before, Dfg?

[A$AP Weed Smoker]

Tity Boi Feat. Yo Gotti - Boo (Official Video) (2011) - YouTube

Tity Boi Feat. Yo Gotti - Boo (Official Video) (2011) - YouTube
Video: click to display

very relevant

[lillix]

I was in a fwb-type situation a few years ago. I wasn't really seeing anyone else, though I had the freedom to do so. He was, though. It didn't bother me except on some visceral, primal level that it would bother anyone in the same situation. We're territorial creatures. He was convinced, however, that I was fucking every and anyone that wandered into my field of vision, and used to constantly pry and be upset with me over his mind's complete fucking farce. I broke it off because of the hypocrisy.

It's right for some of the people, some of the time, I'm sure.

I do have a couple of friends in a happy and loving open relationship. They live together and are more 'serious' than fwb. They're married, and comfortable. They have a good home life, a good sex life. But both are free to be open with themselves and bring someone home, either for themselves or to share. Personally, I like that arrangement. If both partners can be amiable to that kind of thing, I think it's more likely to stand the trials that polygamy brings.

EDIT: That said, I'm not sure I could ever follow through with that or would attempt an fwb again. I'm pretty monogamy-minded nowadways.

[13579]

Originally Posted by ObscuredByClouds

For a while, yes, yes it is. Then you start feeling more attached and begin to feel jealous that she could be potentially fucking other guys too. Then when you're not with her you spend your nights lying awake wondering how many cocks she has in her mouth right now, and even though you don't want to think about, you are kept awake tormented by the thought of numerous throbbing cocks thrusting in and out of her soft pink vagina, the one that you should have all to yourself. No, it's not true, she's not a slut! you tell yourself, wishing and praying that you two are exclusive. Next time you see her and fuck her you realize that you are indirectly fucking those other dudes who penetrated her last night while you were at home whacking off to free porn. Then you realize that you're just being used for sex by a huge fucking slut, and although you may try to tell yourself that you're somehow special, you know deep down that you are just being used, only to be thrown away when something better comes along (like a real man who she wants a relationship with). Yes, you are nothing but a method for her to maintain her sexual sanity while she searches for a suitable mate (read: not you).

Go ahead and tell yourself it's the best. You are fooling no one, not even yourself.

Ex-fucking-actly.

[JeffreyH]

Originally Posted by Weed Smoker

imo the best relationship is like a tier above fwb. light, fun, no titles, no drama, low accountability.. just enjoying the company of another person for what it is.

This.

I mean, not having ever been in an "official" relationship, how do those even come about? Seems to me to be entirely a product of TV and pop culture.

I don't know. I feel like I would only want to proceed with making things progressively more official if I was considering starting a family with the person eventually. But if we both know this is not to be a permanent thing and there WILL be an end to it?

[Oct]

It's all good till they're "getting into" someone, god i fucking hate it when they say that .Whore.

[Jesus "Fuck Lepers" Christ]

If you're getting attached to your friend with benefits, its probably because you're less attractive or worse at finding a mate!

[ayingerbrau]

FWB, 99.99% of the conversations are like this-

"Have you fucked anyone else?"
"No, you?"
"No."
"LOL FWB!!!"

In reality both people are probably off fucking someone else, or at least one of them will be. Then as said, one or the other will get jealous.

[Jealiaz]

Originally Posted by aquabania

prove me wrong

Good luck with that

[JeffreyH]

"friends with benefits" is a myth. Either you care who the people that you are fucking fuck, or you don't. There is no difference between "friends with benefits" and "a romantic relationship", it's the same thing, the only thing different is the semantics.

[Jesus "Fuck Lepers" Christ]

Originally Posted by JeffreyH

"friends with benefits" is a myth. Either you care who the people that you are fucking fuck, or you don't. There is no difference between "friends with benefits" and "a romantic relationship", it's the same thing, the only thing different is the semantics.

Just because you don't care if they are fucking someone else doesn't mean you can't be friends. There are plenty of people who can handle that without getting jealous or emotional.

Your statements that "FWB is a myth" or its the exact same as a romantic relationship are baseless. If you care who your partner fucks, and can control your urge to fuck people outside your relationship, you should be in a romantic, monogamous, relationship. If you don't care, and want to fuck people without having to hang out with them all the time or do other boyfriend/girlfriend bullshit, then friends with benefits is the ideal relationship for you! The point of this style of relationship is to keep up walls, due to being hurt in the past by bad relationships, or not actually giving a fuck about the person once you've had your orgasm(s).

I think a lot of guys get into FWB type relationships because they're desperate for sex. They don't realize this is not the ideal relationship for them, or they don't care. They might even think they can make that girl fall for them eventually. It is kind of like, if you can't say the word penis or vagina out loud, you probably shouldn't be having sex. You shouldn't be trying to have a friend with benefits if you actually feel any sort of attachment to the people you fuck.

Some guys don't even have that feeling of attachment, they just feel like they own a pussy once they put their dick inside of it! Then get all controlling, despite not putting in the work to earn the right of making that pussy theirs and only theirs. Then again most men get silly ideas about how the relationship is supposed to work once they've had their first orgasm inside of a new girl.


tldr: stick to long-term monogamous relationships if you can't handle the polyamorous-esque lifestyle that comes with friends with benefits style relationships.

[moron]

I'm in a friends-with-benefits kind of summer fling right now, but she's a couple years younger and far from slutty (kind of nerdy in fact). Seeing as we both agreed not to fuck anyone else I suppose technically we're "dating" but as far as anyone else knows we're friends. This is the ideal relationship for me right now because we hang out and bang a lot, but we're both broke so we don't really go out or do anything that costs money, and we both are going away to school in a month so there's no future to think about. Just being happy, right now, enjoying each other's company (and bodies ) for the time we have left.

I saw a quote online somewhere that really sums up what I'm looking for in any girl I'm with-

How beautiful is it to find someone who asks for nothing more than your wellbeing?

No fancy dinners, no extravagant garbage designed to impress, no judgment meeting her family, no pressure.

Just me and her cruising beers in my canoe up the river, floating to a hidden spot for some animalistic forest fucking.

[JeffreyH]

Originally Posted by Jesus "Fuck Lepers" Christ

Just because you don't care if they are fucking someone else doesn't mean you can't be friends. There are plenty of people who can handle that without getting jealous or emotional.

Your statements that "FWB is a myth" or its the exact same as a romantic relationship are baseless. If you care who your partner fucks, and can control your urge to fuck people outside your relationship, you should be in a romantic, monogamous, relationship. If you don't care, and want to fuck people without having to hang out with them all the time or do other boyfriend/girlfriend bullshit, then friends with benefits is the ideal relationship for you!

Well, what I am saying is that I don't think it is really a choice, it's just that depending on your personality the relationship will take one of many forms. There is no distinct difference between the two, and it's not something you really decide on.

The "friends" part in "friends with benefits" implies that you at least somewhat care about the other person. So what exactly is the difference between that and a "boyfriend/girlfriend" relationship? You either care about people you fuck in general fucking others or you don't - labelling a relationship one or the other is not going to change that, it's more of a feature of your personality. Hanging out with them all the time or doing boyfriend/girlfriend bullshit? You hang out as much as you enjoy or are able to either way, if you were friends before then you probably hung out anyway, and what is the "boyfriend/girlfriend bullshit" you speak of? If you find it to be bullshit, why would you be doing that in any case, even if she was the most important person in the world to you?

Originally Posted by Jesus "Fuck Lepers" Christ

The point of this style of relationship is to keep up walls, due to being hurt in the past by bad relationships, or not actually giving a fuck about the person once you've had your orgasm(s).

Doesn't sound like something friends would do.

Originally Posted by Jesus "Fuck Lepers" Christ

I think a lot of guys get into FWB type relationships because they're desperate for sex. They don't realize this is not the ideal relationship for them, or they don't care. They might even think they can make that girl fall for them eventually. It is kind of like, if you can't say the word penis or vagina out loud, you probably shouldn't be having sex. You shouldn't be trying to have a friend with benefits if you actually feel any sort of attachment to the people you fuck.

Some guys don't even have that feeling of attachment, they just feel like they own a pussy once they put their dick inside of it! Then get all controlling, despite not putting in the work to earn the right of making that pussy theirs and only theirs. Then again most men get silly ideas about how the relationship is supposed to work once they've had their first orgasm inside of a new girl.

Being controlling without her explicit/implicit consent is not right no matter what the circumstances.

Originally Posted by Jesus "Fuck Lepers" Christ

tldr: stick to long-term monogamous relationships if you can't handle the polyamorous-esque lifestyle that comes with friends with benefits style relationships.

My point is: aren't long-term monogamous relationships only classified as "long-term monogamous relationships" post-factum? I.e.: you cannot tell in a relationship that is a week/month old whether it is a long-term relationship or if it is a monogamous one. That's not how relationships work, I believe. 5 years down the road, however, you can look back at a relationship you've had with a girl, where you have been honest with each other and never slept with others because you didn't want to hurt the other person (and didn't want to in general) (pretty easy to know if the other person would be hurt by it or not without any explicit agreements), and say to yourself, "that was a long-term monogamous relationship".

[JeffreyH]

Originally Posted by moron

I'm in a friends-with-benefits kind of summer fling right now, but she's a couple years younger and far from slutty (kind of nerdy in fact). Seeing as we both agreed not to fuck anyone else I suppose technically we're "dating" but as far as anyone else knows we're friends. This is the ideal relationship for me right now because we hang out and bang a lot, but we're both broke so we don't really go out or do anything that costs money, and we both are going away to school in a month so there's no future to think about. Just being happy, right now, enjoying each other's company (and bodies ) for the time we have left.

I saw a quote online somewhere that really sums up what I'm looking for in any girl I'm with-



No fancy dinners, no extravagant garbage designed to impress, no judgment meeting her family, no pressure.

Just me and her cruising beers in my canoe up the river, floating to a hidden spot for some animalistic forest fucking.

That's exactly what I am talking about. What is the difference between what you described and "dating"? In this case, it's having a press-release and a press conference, apparently. And then keeping the media off your backs by going on "dates" and thinking about the future (which you should do anyway, but if you think about how it's going to work in the future every time you get into a relationship with someone, you probably wouldn't be getting into any until you are in your late 30s).

But as far as you two are concerned, which is the only thing that matters in a relationship (or should matter), how exactly is your arrangement different from a "boyfriend/girlfriend" type one? It's the same thing. Maybe the words you say are different, but words don't mean jack shit.

[JeffreyH]

Bump.

[clubbed]

My partner and i were in a friends-with-benefits situation for a number of months before we realized it was becoming what is now our open relationship. I still have friends i occasionally fuck, and i enjoy both my relationship and those benefit-friendships immensely.

How beautiful is it to find someone who asks for nothing more than your wellbeing?

While fwb-ship may not be ideal for everyone, it seems more conducive to this ^^^^ than monogamy in general, imo. My partner's in bed with someone else right now, and while i'm not thrilled that it isn't me, i am thrilled that it makes him happy and that he is open with me about it. Because we're friends, not control-seeking monsters.

Friends-with-benefits is awesome because the friendship part is included explicitly. I've seen many relationships between people who fought so much you could hardly call them friends anymore. The friendship between people seems more important to me than how many people each party is fucking.

[ArmsMerchant]

Originally Posted by aquabania

prove me wrong

What's to prove? You are entitled to your opinion.

Of course, you will most likely change your mind when you grow up and move out of your mom's basement.

[Oct]

I have the worst case of blue balls, serious Ted Bundyitis right here 'yo. In need of someone or something to drain my nuts into, i was even thinking of taking a leaf out of Sepht's book and raping the neighbor's dog.

[Communicate]

Originally Posted by ObscuredByClouds

For a while, yes, yes it is. Then you start feeling more attached and begin to feel jealous that she could be potentially fucking other guys too. Then when you're not with her you spend your nights lying awake wondering how many cocks she has in her mouth right now, and even though you don't want to think about, you are kept awake tormented by the thought of numerous throbbing cocks thrusting in and out of her soft pink vagina, the one that you should have all to yourself. No, it's not true, she's not a slut! you tell yourself, wishing and praying that you two are exclusive. Next time you see her and fuck her you realize that you are indirectly fucking those other dudes who penetrated her last night while you were at home whacking off to free porn. Then you realize that you're just being used for sex by a huge fucking slut, and although you may try to tell yourself that you're somehow special, you know deep down that you are just being used, only to be thrown away when something better comes along (like a real man who she wants a relationship with). Yes, you are nothing but a method for her to maintain her sexual sanity while she searches for a suitable mate (read: not you).

Go ahead and tell yourself it's the best. You are fooling no one, not even yourself.

That's ridiculous. What if she were the one having those thoughts about it?

What you're describing is a one side attraction where people happen to be having non-exclusive sex. It's missing the whole 'friends' part.

[Mirana]

Originally Posted by ArmsMerchant

What's to prove? You are entitled to your opinion.

Of course, you will most likely change your mind when you grow up and move out of your mom's basement.

Lol big man living at a cabin in the middle of the freezing woods.. I'd live in my mom's hallway closet over that, let alone a basement.

[-Fuck-]

It all depends on the situation. It's better than NOTHING, I guess. I think most people prefer just one person, it's really the society around them coupled with jealousy that ruins it.

Moving out of mom's house or living in the freezing woods both are products of a society that is "just" discovering what Atlantis "discovered" thousands of years ago which is what electrical energy can do, and unfortunately, trying to foolishly base it on the money system. It's the reason "homelessness" is even a concept, it shouldn't even exist, in fact most people are living in such a dreamworld, it never ceases to amaze me how much all of this will change within 100 years.

Morally having a woman over while living with mom can be done but it has to be extremely discreet, clean, respectful, and SILENT. Society is a joke, dont let it make your life one by believing it is here to take care of you and there aren't some sick assholes that are at the top of the biggest companies today who "decide" if you're "allowed" to: "work here" "live here" "date my daughter"... etc. Things that arent up to people... are the only things that are real.

There are homeless people with no address unable to get employment. Never forget that, if you are ever pressured that at a certain age "you gotta MAKE IT, you gotta MOVE OUT MAN, GROW UP GET OUT OF MOMMY AND DADDYS YOU BIG BABY, GO MAKE MONEY!" and the world just rolls out this red carpet with loving arms to give you steady employment, steady living quarters and a nice perfect life. Society sucks. Companies lay off old people, bosses hire cute chicks over educated hard working good men, and racism has it's role too.

The best time of my life was when I worked 8 hrs, survived on pizza, pot and booze, fucked my gf everyday in my parent's basement mostly (and behind her school, in her house, etc), made literally 90 bucks a week, dropped out of school and didnt give a shit about anything. The only issue I had was the constant jealousy of my asshole friends who were always after her and ended up with her after I finally broke it off. I went through a lot of heartache, good times, and bad times, but that's LIFE.

Im not going to pretend when I was getting any one night stand I wanted, making 3x my rent with my own pad and car, that I was even remotely happier than when I was with my ex. I dunno if it's how many jobs I've wasted time with instead of finishing my education (now I finally am) or just not having her, but I still miss her. As much shit as I went through I STILL wish I could just take it, fight with her and still take her and be with her because let me tell you life is EMPTY if you have no one to live for, seriously. Your friends and parents one day WONT CARE about you anymore, they will move on and leave you, usually. You will be this empty person unable to stop expressing yourself, with no one to receive you. You can have FWB all you want but there is a "distance" requirement in that, and THAT is going to make you face your real deep issues, because you will ask yourself WHY are you distancing yourself from the opposite sex.

We dont live in a perfect world. If the opposite sex doesnt lie or cheat, sometimes it can get worse, ruining your reputation, having you fired, arrested, etc. People can play all sorts of evil, sick, cruel games. So in some cases, it's just easier to keep sex appointment only. That's not to say it's ideal, or wonderful, it might just be a lot of people suck and it doesn't mean you want to sacrifice sex entirely, so you make a few adjustments, a few deals, contracts and unspoken understandings. Hey, whatever makes you happy. It's all up to you.