Christians don't know what "fap" means, ban member for being correct

Captain Falcon · #1 02-07-2011, 09:21 AM

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=37578

lol

Also, I agree, SP is fappable.

Snoopy · #2 02-07-2011, 09:40 AM

Seems like a troll forum.

DECI4 · #3 02-07-2011, 09:44 AM

Its the ultimate troll forum.

J.P.W · #4 02-07-2011, 09:57 AM

I can't think of anything funny to say, but this is amazing.

Mr. White · #5 02-07-2011, 10:06 AM

rofl, this forum has been posted on totse several times and even WE always wtf at it.. but yeah i think it must be a massive troll forum.

Quote:

This is all in your dirty mind my friend. I have no doubt in those darkrooms you often visit every word is interpreted in a nasty way, but normal people view the world in a different way.

If you ask normal people what FAP means you will get answers like: FORTRAN Assembly Program, Fair Access Policy, Femto Access Point, Functional analytic psychotherapy, Familial adenomatous polyposis, Familial amyloid polyneuropathy, Fixed action pattern or Fas-associated phosphatase.

You see, normal people have normal meanings for normal words. Not everything is about sex.

Snoopy · #6 02-07-2011, 10:12 AM

Okay, looking at the "awards" some of the posters have gotten it is obviously a troll forum and funny as hell. lol @ the "teabag patriot" medal. It's a medal resembling golden testicles.

All those idiots subbing there to "tell it like it is" are getting played like a fisher-price.

nutsack · #7 02-07-2011, 10:15 AM

Lol I remember this site. Show it to christians and tell them this is what they are a part of.

Captain Falcon · #8 02-07-2011, 10:29 AM

The banned guy has his name crossed out with the User title "confirmed enemy of god"

Captain Falcon · #9 02-07-2011, 10:32 AM

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=54668

Tokerface · #10 02-07-2011, 10:36 AM

The "putting the stud back in bible study" made me lol.

Combat Womabt · #11 02-07-2011, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Captain Falcon

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=54668

No way this isn't a troll forum after this.

J.P.W · #12 02-07-2011, 11:37 AM

''My four daughters want to come but they are too young. Next December 9th, the eldest, Carol, will be 18, perhaps we could send her there after the new year. She'll have to work out a deal with the rest of the kids to take over her chores for the weekend.

Here is Jessica, she'll be 18 come Next August 3rd.

''

''Brother James, I can see in young Jessica's eyes that she yearns deeply and passionately for the Lord. You have no idea how badly I want to minister to her right now, but she is 17, but I don't want to get into any legal trouble as my ministry requires an age-of-consent.

I can help this young cowgirl straddle herself into understanding God's Word® and ride herself to eternal Salvation®. She'll be buckin' and yelling "yee-haw" for the Lord! ''

This is the most disturbing shit I've ever had the pleasure of reading.

Snoopy · #13 02-07-2011, 11:40 AM

lol internal plumbing

NamelessNom4d · #14 02-07-2011, 11:41 AM

ROFL I remember when I first saw this shit get posted, fucking hilarious man.

DEFINITELY a troll forum but it's epic!

THIS IS IMPORTANT GODDAMNIT · #15 02-07-2011, 11:55 AM

this is funnier than the obama forum

Former_Member · #16 02-07-2011, 11:56 AM

eh, it's a satire of the christian right.

I'm glad, though people like that do exist, I was worried they were more common than I last thought.

RIPtotse · #17 02-07-2011, 11:58 AM

landover baptist is ancient man, but still funnier than shit

**zuperxtreme** · #18 02-07-2011, 11:59 AM

Moving to LOLI.

Yurpen · #19 02-07-2011, 12:03 PM

They also believe you can't eat lobstarz or you burn in hell.

Deuteronomy 14:9-11 (New International Version, ©2010)
"9 Of all the creatures living in the water, you may eat any that has fins and scales. 10 But anything that does not have fins and scales you may not eat; for you it is unclean."

lol that forum is full of fail and lulz.

Qhost · #20 02-07-2011, 03:09 PM

A troll forum, if you want something to genuinely rage at..

http://www.theflatearthsociety.org/forum/

Arcade · #21 02-07-2011, 03:30 PM

thats one of the best reads in a while...hilarious

unstableasatable · #22 02-07-2011, 03:54 PM

"These games have a clear bias against Christianity.

The "pocket monsters", likely to be a phallic symbol, are allowed to evolve in the game. This is a definite stance against God's creation of the universe.

Not only that, but the monsters are depicted as Devils and dragons. Anything outside the realm of God's original creation is demonic. These monsters use "special powers" which could induce kids into thinking that witchcraft accepted.

Furthermore, there has been reports of kids suffering epilepsy attacks after watching the cartoon.

Epilepsy? Please.

It's a warning from God. A proactive torment. "

Arcade · #23 02-07-2011, 03:58 PM

I've been reading that forum for the past 30 mins or so, good laughs

Quote:

Teenager 'murdered young woman for dressing as a Goth'

From The Times 12th March: A drunken 15-year-old boy kicked and stamped a young woman to death because she was dressed as a Goth, a court heard today.
The teenager was part of a five-strong gang, who acted “like a pack of wild animals” as they “savagely and mercilessly” attacked Sophie Lancaster, 20, and her boyfriend, a jury was told.
The boy, whose trial for murder began today at Preston Crown Court, was accused of starting the violence, with a flying kick to the head of Robert Maltby, Miss Lancaster's 21-year-old boyfriend.
The jury heard that the gang, “encouraging each other and laughing”, then punched, stamped and jumped on the art student's head until he was unconscious.

As I see it, the young Christian man on his way to church with a few colleagues, was depressed at the godless state of the UK. Prior to leaving home, he had had a quiet drink to discuss the matter with his friends, he was then assaulted by a Goth trying typical violence to convert him to her heathen ways.

Arcade · #24 02-07-2011, 04:02 PM

lmao!

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=9710

Yurpen · #25 02-07-2011, 04:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arcade

lmao!

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=9710

Are these guys for real?

White Jesus · #26 02-07-2011, 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yurpen

Are these guys for real?

If you have to ask.....

Arcade · #27 02-07-2011, 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yurpen

Are these guys for real?

no, but I would imagine such people exist.

I can't believe the amount of time people put into trolling tho, it's kinda pathetic.

Yurpen · #28 02-07-2011, 05:00 PM

"My dog was skinned and stuffed in my mailbox. It was horrible! I would run into members of the Ladies of Landover at the Christian Super Store and they would pelt me with prayer cards. Once, Sister Taffy tried to stone me as I walked to my car. Fortunately, I was not hurt, but the hood of my BMW SUV was dented and my windshield only stayed on because of the glue they put in the glass. I was terrified! Since then, I have been in hiding. I've had my phone number changed 7 times."

Cito · #29 02-07-2011, 05:01 PM

I'm a christian and I shall continue the fappage.

ilovechronic · #30 02-07-2011, 05:25 PM

someone needs to get on that shit. That is just ridiculous. Some of those posts. He even tells them don't shoot the messenger. Telling him its all in his mind and "why would you use the word fap for masturbate herpa derpa?"

I hope there are not really people that closed minded but I know its not true.
I am sure those fuckers are the dirtiest old men of them all.

turboneger · #31 02-07-2011, 07:02 PM

I don't know how to multiquote but SO many lulz on that site it's not even funny.

**zuperxtreme** · #32 02-07-2011, 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by turboneger

I don't know how to multiquote but SO many lulz on that site it's not even funny.

[quote="Quoted post"]
[quote="Quoted quoted post"]
STUPID SHIT HERE
[/quote]
YEAH I AGREE WITH STUPID SHIT TOO
[/quote]
"LOL SEE THESE IDIOTS?"

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quoted post

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quoted quoted post

STUPID SHIT HERE

YEAH I AGREE WITH STUPID SHIT TOO

"LOL SEE THESE IDIOTS?"

Leik dat

Former_Member · #33 02-07-2011, 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arcade

no, but I would imagine such people exist.

I can't believe the amount of time people put into trolling tho, it's kinda pathetic.

It's not trolling. It's a media project, that whole website is completely inorganic.

Arcade · #34 02-07-2011, 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ryan1711

It's not trolling. It's a media project, that whole website is completely inorganic.

It's trolling, or as I like to call it, JFLC Faggotry.

King of the world · #35 02-07-2011, 08:55 PM

That site is a goldmine of lulz

When I'm permabanned from here, that'll be my permanent home.

Combat Womabt · #36 02-07-2011, 09:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ryan1711

It's not trolling. It's a media project, that whole website is completely inorganic.

It is trolling. They post this shit in order to get a reaction, usually angry ones. They have a whole page devoted to hate mail.

Mutant Funk Drink · #37 02-07-2011, 09:51 PM

That site is hilarious.

Hydroponichronic · #38 02-07-2011, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Captain Falcon

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=37578

lol

Also, I agree, SP is fappable.

lulz

Rainycity · #39 02-07-2011, 10:09 PM

i tried to troll that site and failed, plus it takes like 1 minute to post

Soupa · #40 02-07-2011, 10:28 PM

lets troll them everyone!

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