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  #1  
Old 10-23-2011, 07:44 AM
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Default Methods to fuck up a car?

so theres this car parked down the road belongs to the neighbors. If one was to be hypothetically bored enough to actually decide to fuck it up anyone got any suggestions? the car is litterally parked at the bottom of my drive way one could easily fuck it up and gap it back to my house without being seen any ideas?
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Old 10-23-2011, 07:49 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

like this, easy

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Old 10-23-2011, 07:51 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

put glass etch on the windows or put syrup+paint thinner on the paint
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Old 10-23-2011, 07:56 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Lol good idea .was thinking of launching eggs of my balcony to since I can see it from there
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Old 10-23-2011, 08:01 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

When i was an irresponsible (and immoral) 14 year old me and some had a pretty serious vandalism spree. One game we would play was called stone wall jackson, where we would take stones from stone walls, get our car up to about 60 mph, then let the stone go out the side window, at the parked car. In hindsight it was quite fucked up.
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Old 10-30-2011, 11:08 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by p6867 View Post
When i was an irresponsible (and immoral) 14 year old me and some had a pretty serious vandalism spree. One game we would play was called stone wall jackson, where we would take stones from stone walls, get our car up to about 60 mph, then let the stone go out the side window, at the parked car. In hindsight it was quite fucked up.
possible murder charge if there happens be a couple making out in there, or just some frustrated husband sneaking a joint while waiting for his obnoxious whore of a wife's medication to kick in so the bitch could just SHUT HER FUCKING TRAP AND GO TO FUCKING SLEEP YOU FUCKING WHORE!!!!! yea... that coulda been bad bro.
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Old 10-30-2011, 08:45 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Ok get a 5 gallon bucket. Find some roadkill or go buy some big nasty fish at your local meat department. Get a bunch of horseradish, cocktail sauce, mayo, ect. Put in bucket with fish. Run up to car break window with something dump bucket inside. Also if you want to get creative you could shit in the bucket as well.
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Old 10-31-2011, 03:11 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Sugar in the tank, or is it salt that fucks up the engine? I can't remember. Anyway I heard it works pretty good and kills the engine.
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  #9  
Old 10-31-2011, 03:18 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

superglue pennys all over it in the shape of curse words n dicks

it with mess the paint up when they rip em off

if u glue em to the window it might fuck up the glass 2
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  #10  
Old 10-31-2011, 01:36 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

do they have lighters in your state/city?
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  #11  
Old 10-31-2011, 01:49 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

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Originally Posted by TheBlackDalia View Post
Sugar in the tank, or is it salt that fucks up the engine? I can't remember. Anyway I heard it works pretty good and kills the engine.
That would be sand in the fuel tank . If you do this it quite literally fucks the car once enough cycles, you just gained a nice 2 ton paper weight.

or

Thermite... go figure.

Now if you don't want to fuck their car totally cinder blocks are cheep. Paint stripper is even cheaper still Or you could offer to paint their car with say white-out or your normal paint stored in balloons.
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Old 10-31-2011, 01:49 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Also JB Weld in key holes .
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  #13  
Old 10-31-2011, 05:33 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Don't do it OP if your get away method is running to your nearby home. It's also very easy to get caught that way. Sorry I'm so late to say this.

Last edited by kingOfCrash; 10-31-2011 at 05:35 PM.
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  #14  
Old 10-31-2011, 05:35 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

If its a hot day out, cover the whole car in pancake batter.
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  #15  
Old 10-31-2011, 05:41 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

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Originally Posted by Marsh View Post
If its a hot day out, cover the whole car in pancake batter.
Nah, break a window and pour it all in then use saran wrap to cover the window up. You'll probably want to use the industrial wrapping stuff because there needs to be a good seal.
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  #16  
Old 10-31-2011, 06:17 PM
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Grin Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marsh View Post
If its a hot day out, cover the whole car in pancake batter.
This made me lol so hard.

Also, thermite on the hood of the car.
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  #17  
Old 10-31-2011, 06:28 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

just open the door - jam a large fireworks rocket in the seat and light it.

Leave the door open or the lack of oxygen will snuff out the resulting fire.

Do it Halloween night. Tonight.
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  #18  
Old 11-03-2011, 01:35 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Painzstake View Post
That would be sand in the fuel tank . If you do this it quite literally fucks the car once enough cycles, you just gained a nice 2 ton paper weight.
Bullshit.

It's called a fuel filter. All cars have them. Learn something before you blast BS.

The only liquid/solid that will make it through the filter is bleach. All it does it make the engine stall.

You'd be better off getting under the hood and disconnecting something like the water-pump from the serpentine belt, so it overheats. Or drain almost all the oil.
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  #19  
Old 11-03-2011, 04:32 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cooldarkknick View Post
Bullshit.

It's called a fuel filter. All cars have them. Learn something before you blast BS.

The only liquid/solid that will make it through the filter is bleach. All it does it make the engine stall.

You'd be better off getting under the hood and disconnecting something like the water-pump from the serpentine belt, so it overheats. Or drain almost all the oil.

actually the bleach will melt away a whole bunch of different rubber seals and O-rings. It'll also cause rust inside the engine. Mostly the guy wont know wtf is going on with his car. Sometimes it works, most of the times it doesn't. Nothing like spending 2 grand to fix what you thought was a problem to have your car act up again the next day. Bleach really is the car killer.. best of all it does it slowly. It's like car cancer.
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  #20  
Old 11-03-2011, 04:51 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

The bleach goes in the oil, not the petrol tank. This'll cause massive overheating.

If you put it in the petrol tank, all it'll do is cause the tank to rust. The engine won't rust because it's constantly moving, and the rubber seals won't break down because they are made from synthetic chemical resistant rubber - bleach only breaks up natural rubber.
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  #21  
Old 11-03-2011, 05:06 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

uhhhh steal it, build a sweet ramp, and bring a helmet.
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  #22  
Old 11-03-2011, 07:48 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Painzstake View Post
That would be sand in the fuel tank .
no its not its sugar you fool. roll your eyes and you dont even know what your talkin about, lol. sugar turns to caramel when it burns and gunges the whole shit up beyond repair pretty much. you try cleaning burnt caramel out of that cylinder block and out of all those valves and shit. it'd take fucking forever, to the point where it would be both cheaper and easier to replace the engine completely.

anyway, coke or pepsi fucks up car paint, so just make up some cola balloons and toss them from the balcony. do a few once a week or something and after a month his paint work will be proper shitty.

course if you really want revenge then call the local cops saying you overheard him talking about doing an insurance job on his car and then a few days later steal the car and drive into lake/river/off cliff. not only will he probably get arrested for doing it himself, but his insurance will jump at the chance to refuse to pay up.
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  #23  
Old 11-03-2011, 07:53 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Spectral and Meme - neither sugar nor sand (!) are soluble in gasoline, so both would just be stopped by the fuel filter. It'll still be a pain for the owner because the car will stall after a few miles, but it won't cause any damage to the engine.
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  #24  
Old 11-03-2011, 08:00 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ratfrink View Post
Spectral and Meme - neither sugar nor sand (!) are soluble in gasoline, so both would just be stopped by the fuel filter. It'll still be a pain for the owner because the car will stall after a few miles, but it won't cause any damage to the engine.
No, man. With sand some still gets by the filter and fucks the engine over. Guaranteed.
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  #25  
Old 11-03-2011, 08:06 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

It would have to be incredibly fine sand to get through the filter at all.

N.B. I used to work as a mechanic.

edit - if you had a means to open the fuel filler, you'd presumably also be able to open the bonnet (in fact, in some cars you can do this just by crawling underneath and pulling the release cable or latch - no need to enter the vehicle itself) - sand in the oil filler will definitely mess up the engine.

Last edited by ratfrink; 11-03-2011 at 08:09 PM.
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  #26  
Old 11-03-2011, 08:31 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

I understand that, I'm just saying that the filter will get blocked by the large grains and the car will stall before any damage is done to the engine. Getting a few grains of microscopic sand into the engine won't do shit, because it'll get flushed out before it has a chance to abrade anything.

Unless, of course, you manage to get hold of some incredibly fine sand which'll get more sand into the engine before it stalls.
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Old 11-03-2011, 08:33 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ratfrink View Post
I understand that, I'm just saying that the filter will get blocked by the large grains and the car will stall before any damage is done to the engine. Getting a few grains of microscopic sand into the engine won't do shit, because it'll get flushed out before it has a chance to abrade anything.

Unless, of course, you manage to get hold of some incredibly fine sand which'll get more sand into the engine before it stalls.
Try it some day with a clunker. Drop a few handfuls of beach sand in there and run the engine for an hour. You'll see how "harmless" it is for yourself. lol
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Old 11-03-2011, 08:45 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

bologna + heat= a polka-dotted car (once they pull them off theyll realized the meat has stripped of piant in perfect circles). clay in the exhaust pipes is always fun too
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  #29  
Old 11-03-2011, 10:27 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

y'all are retarded. I'm calling mythbusters on your ass!!

http://dsc.discovery.com/cars/top-10/car-myths/07.html

sugar ................ WRONG
sand ................ WRONG


google bleach in gas tank and you shall see the light.
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  #30  
Old 11-03-2011, 10:37 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by -SpectraL View Post
Try it some day with a clunker. Drop a few handfuls of beach sand in there and run the engine for an hour. You'll see how "harmless" it is for yourself. lol
The engine won't run for a fucking hour, you idiot, it won't even run for five minutes. How many times do I have to repeat myself? If you put sand in someone's petrol tank, the engine will cut out.



Paulbras, Mythbusters said this about bleach in the petrol tank - 'The engine soon died out but wasn’t ruined from the experience. The following morning, the inside of the gas tank was covered in rust.'. It won't kill the car, but it'll kill the petrol tank after a while... better to put bleach in the oil.
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Old 11-03-2011, 10:43 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ratfrink View Post
The engine won't run for a fucking hour, you idiot, it won't even run for five minutes. How many times do I have to repeat myself? If you put sand in someone's petrol tank, the engine will cut out...
Yes, the engine cuts out, but not before the fine particles of sand have entered the engine. So even when it cuts out and you remove all the remaining sand from the filter and the tank, the fine particles are already up inside the engine. The more you use the engine after that, even on clean gas, the more the engine will be damaged. True story, bro.
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  #32  
Old 11-03-2011, 11:36 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

spectral: that myth is busted bro
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  #33  
Old 11-03-2011, 11:45 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ratfrink View Post
edit - if you had a means to open the fuel filler,....
If the victim has a '97 - 2003 Ford f-series truck, the fuel filter is on the frame rail about half way down the truck..
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  #34  
Old 11-03-2011, 11:48 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Get some acetone and pour it all over the car

Paint job be gone
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  #35  
Old 11-04-2011, 12:02 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Don't be a an asshole and go vandlizing it...just steal the spare change.
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  #36  
Old 11-04-2011, 12:10 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Actor View Post
Don't be a an asshole and go vandlizing it...just steal the spare change.
Fuck that
Screwing the paint job up is where the fun really is
Especially if they have private insurance and it makes the rates go up
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Last edited by pill popper; 11-04-2011 at 12:16 AM.
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  #37  
Old 11-04-2011, 02:46 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Sand in the oil, nigguh.
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  #38  
Old 11-04-2011, 01:12 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

Quote:
Originally Posted by -SpectraL View Post
Yes, the engine cuts out, but not before the fine particles of sand have entered the engine. So even when it cuts out and you remove all the remaining sand from the filter and the tank, the fine particles are already up inside the engine. The more you use the engine after that, even on clean gas, the more the engine will be damaged. True story, bro.
Fucking facepalm.

Like I said, you can flush those few little particles out of the engine fairly quickly. It's called changing the oil. That's why people change the oil in the first place. You think the victim will realise he potentially has sand in the engine, but won't think to change the oil? You obviously didn't - perhaps I should try this out on your car.
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  #39  
Old 11-06-2011, 07:39 AM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

This has probably been mentioned but what would be the best way to torch a vehicle? I'm thinking cracking open the gas cap have a rag ready that's been doused in alcohol and light it after shoving it in the gas cap? I'm sure there are better ways to torch a vehicle if you can think of any please mention them. SWIM wants to do this to a certain individual that pissed him off.
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Old 11-06-2011, 03:45 PM
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Default Re: Methods to fuck up a car?

double ziploc bag, potassium permanganate, stuff into gas tank, gtfo.
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