summer camp

[cool_kid23435]

when I was 14 I had an english teacher who was a bitch. I won't go into it too much, I'll just say, when it comes to english teachers, especially female ones there's a good chance they suck at teaching, there annoying, there a bitch. All teachers are dirty bitches actually. But, not all of them made me fall behind the class and miss out on work, this old lady did though.

I got sick with pneumonia which basically started it all, but I had problems with her before this happened. So she tells my mum that I need to catch up on work I missed, but I got so screwed around, that I would have to do this work during the summer. She tells my mum that I won't get it done unless she sends me to this study camp thing over the summer. Well my mum liked the idea of sending me away to a summer camp, so she told me to pack my bags, and go to where the buses leaves from in the morning a few days after school finished. Little did I know this was not the camp my english teacher told my mum about. my mum just wanted to send me away to summer camp so she rang this kids mum and got details about a summer camp that had nothing to do with the study camp. I brought the work with me expecting to do it at camp.

as soon as we got to the camp, the counsellars took everyones bags and we were sent to a hall where we were breifed about the camp. first thing I realised, this place was total crap, even for a summer camp. second thing, there was no time allocated for any kind of study, and no unsupervised free time where we could do what we wanted. after everybody left that breifing hall I told a counsellar about the work I had to do and he told me to stfu and get to the rec hall. Well all of the bags were against one wall of the rec hall and there were counsellars going through some of them. There was a big pile of stuff which, was all confiscated from the bags. all of the bags were searched, and anything that was 'contraband' was confiscated, which wasn't just regular contraband, but also whatever else they felt like confiscating, which included a lot of the work I had to catch up on.

the way they decided cabin groups was by assorting everyone into random activity groups in the rec hall. The groups were rotated around until they decided who should be with who. Well, the counsellar that was supervising my end of the hall didn't give a shit and as a result, he told several of the kids including me where to go and it got all screwed up. I ended up getting stuck on most of the rotations with two guys, reymon and tomy. reymon and tomy barely even attempted most of the excercises. I kind of got dragged down with them, I could have done better with more motivated people but I more or less did what they did. they were both, well, not really normal. And the counsellar was noticing how poorly we were doing the activities.

A combination of this and me calling the counsellar a dirty bitch because of his screwing everything up resulted in us being identified as a 'problematic group'. turns out that every year, they identify one or two groups as 'problematic groups', and they're treated differently the entire camp, given less privelages and basically punished for being retarded. The other groups were bigger, my group was just me, tomy and reymon. We were put into this little cabin away from all of the other cabins. From here on it was just all down hill. The place was total crap for everyone, but for us, it was especially bad. Everybody else could at least make their own fun. It turned out to be some what of an adventure, an adventure which, I would have preffered to stab myself in the head then embark on

to be continued

[reject]

My English teacher had a huge ass, and as such you could always tell when she was wearing a thong.

My Biology teacher, however, was fit as fuck and always had a whale tail.

[Ragnarök]

I was half-expecting a Bel-Air

[Herpy Derpy]

They obviously didn't teach you well...

[Jojoman]

This could be a movie, like a kid's movie. Only if you end up escaping with your band of misfit friends and provide many lulz.

[Duelist]

I thought you were staying with your aunt and uncle (in bel air)?

[LSA King]

tl;dr

[cool_kid23435]

Originally Posted by Sexual Deviant

I thought you were staying with your aunt and uncle (in bel air)?

this happened when I was 14. And I'm staying with my aunt and uncle but NOT IN BEL AIR

[cool_kid23435]

so me and the two other kids get put into this little cabin that is away from all the others. The next day we wake up and its like 11am. I'm thinking we get to sleep in, they're just going to leave us in our cabins while everybody else gets woken up and has to do crap, not so bad. We decide to get up and go and check out the camp site.

While we were walking down to the pool, two counsellars came running up to us and stood there like they were trying to surround us. They told us we had to go to the dining hall and set up for lunch. For like 3 days we had to set up everything, meals and activities. Reymon was this kid who talked a lot, about the counsellars and the other kids at the summer camp. He had a weird voice, and he would talk about cartoonish scenarios he imagined happening between everybody. He also gave us a history of all the summers of his life, and various other things that had happened to him. Basically he would insult everybody at the camp behind their backs by telling these childish stories about them. One day before lunch while we are sitting around at an abseiling site we had to help set up he gets onto this story about everybody's shoe laces getting tied together while they're sitting down in the dining hall. He was talking about it for ages, repeating the same things over and over again, and he had this really annoying, squeeky laugh.

Tomy was a kid whose ambition in life seemed to be to employ special forces type strategies in as many situations possible. He would ramble on about different things that we should do to sneak away or get back at them, so reymon's story about everybody's shoe laces getting tied together naturally got him interested.
we sat at the back of the dining hall with tomy egging reymon on to go and sneak under the tables and tie everyone's shoe laces together. they actually thought that they could tie every single person's laces together, and reymon was talking about what would happen when everybody gets up, over and over again with his weird, squeeky laugh.

so reymon gets under the table and does this incredibly fast crawl towards the next table in front of us. Just as he is about half way a guy is walking back to the table. reymon quickly scuttles back to a part of the wall that juts out and hides behind it like his life is at stake. for about a minute tomy and reymon have a silent argument while I am like this
reymon is facing tomy while a girl is getting up from the other side of the table, and at just that moment, reymon oblivious to the girl scuttles across the floor and right under the table just as she is getting up and facing in his direction. completely fluking it, she doesn't notice him, and he shoots right between these two people's legs just at the right second.
reymon ended up tying about 3 rows together from 3 different tables, it took him ages, and then, he basically got 'stuck', he couldn't crawl back to our table, and after much silent arguing with tomy and close calls, he ended up crawling out the door. I got up from the table to get something from the front so I'd have an opportunity to look out the window. reymon was still crawling, down the passage on the outside of the hall.

I'll post the rest of what happened later, should be just one more post.

[Vizier]

Originally Posted by cool_kid23435

this happened when I was 14. And I'm staying with my aunt and uncle but NOT IN BEL AIR

What the fuck? Is that a reversed Bel-Air? Is it a stronger version, akin to a Reverse Falcon Punch!

[cool_kid23435]

Originally Posted by Vizier

What the fuck? Is that a reversed Bel-Air? Is it a stronger version, akin to a Reverse Falcon Punch!

read my thread I live with my aunt and uncle at the moment, in salt lake city not bel air.

[Space Ultra Guitar Case 3]

Burn the place down.

[cool_kid23435]

what happened when everybody stood up actually turned out to be pretty funny. everyone who'd had their shoelaces tied to somebody elses fell. Not all at once, but they all eventually got pulled down and lost their balance which just made it even funnier. girls were screaming and plates and cutlery went crashing to the floor and flinging off at awkward angles. me and tomy couldn't contain our laughter and I was swelling with a new found respect for reymon.

reymon had actually managed to tie some of the counsellar's shoe laces together. one of the counsellars fell on his wrist and fucked it up. what tomy and reymon didn't think of when they decided to do this was that we would be the first ones the counsellars would blame. reymon was also out of the room at that point so he became the prime suspect. the camp became even more of a shitfest, with the abusive counsellar's 'punishing us' with guantanamo bay shit. we were made to lay face down on the ground outside and remain sitting in uncomfortable positions in the sun for hours. We were sprayed with hoses forced under cold showers, and made to miss meals.
reymon got sent home for his stunt.

after this me and tomy were pretty much on lock down in our cabin. we almost went a little stir crazy. with tomy already planning commando missions this upped the anti a bit. we ended going on stealth missions around the camp site at night, sneaking up on cabins, throwing gravel on the rooves and windows and sneaking into the different halls and stealing food from the dining hall. we actually contemplated getting a canoe out and using it to escape, and we actually went out down to the lake and got a canoe out, but we just ended up paddling around in it for a little bit, and then we decided to fill it with rocks and let it sink. We got another one out and took it up to the breakfast hall and put it on one of the tables.

we'd almost lost it, we were sneaking around during the day when people were off at activities, not really sure exactly what we were doing, but we were trying to do something like flood cabins and buildings by getting the hoses and leading them up to doorways. this was mostly tomy's idea, with me tagging along, but I was eager to cause trouble and I was hungry, dehydrated, bored out of my mind and going stir crazy. I felt a bit delirious like I was half-dreaming.

tomy had decided he'd had enough one day, he wanted to get sent home. he decided he was going to grab this girls boob. we were sitting in the dining hall at lunch time, when he said to me 'ok that's the girl, she's getting up now' and got up to walk to the front of the hall. I was thinking holy shit, he's actually going to do it. he seemed to have timed his getting up at just the right time so as he was passing her table, she was coming around the side. As he passed her table he stumbled forward and pushed some napkins and cutlery off the table with one hand and planted his other hand right on her boob. She let out a little scream and instead of letting go or making it look like a mistake, he kept his hand there as if he was waiting for the powers that be to notice. I think he was actually looking around and just standing there like he was waiting for the bus or something. He looked at me with this crazy smile on his face and then as a counsellar came over, grabbed her other boob and gave them a little squeeze or two and said "salvage these". needless to say that was the end of tomy, he was sent home.

They wanted to call my mum and send me home too for some reason, and after a couple more nights in the 'problematic' cabin I was actually sent to another group's cabin. The next morning or the morning after a person I'd never seen before came in just as I was waking up and told me to come to the office.
I'd done half of the work that I was supposed to catch up on, the other half had been confiscated on the first day when the counsellars had gone through everybody's bags. At the office I asked if I could have the rest of the work back, after all my mum had paid for me to go to the study camp and get the work done. I was told that my mum had actually not paid at all, everbody was supposed to be paid for before they went on the camp and this had not been done in my case. And furthermore this was not a study camp, my mum had just sent me on some summer camp which had nothing to do with the one my bitch of an english teacher had told her about. I asked if I could call my mum and I was told that they actually hadn't been able to get on to her.

"Could I at least just have the rest of my english work back?"
"No, you must be aborted immedietly" was the response, and before I could tell them I was pretty sure it was illegal to abort someone in their fiftieth trimester I was carted off to a car, and I was driven out of the camp. The guy was speeding and it was almost like in the movies where somebody gets pushed out of a moving car. It skidded off and left me on this beaten track leading out of the camp, in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. I ended up having to walk for ages, and then hitch hike all the way home. I had to get rides with truckers and sleep in rest stops, and I'll just say I had a few unpleasant experiences on my journey home and I'll leave it at that. I started taking speed, and I got home needless to say exhausted, burnt out, strung out, only to find out that my mom was gone. That's why the camp hadn't been able to get on to her. So I ended up living on the streets in LA, but that's a story for another day I guess.

[Miaow]

I didn't read any of this.

[cool_kid23435]

I'm going to make another thread with the three posts in a row because it's not very readable with all of the other posts in between

[danmega]

Originally Posted by Lovecraft <3

I didn't read any of this.

Me either. Interestingly enough, my moniter is shitting bananas atm and is ranging wildly from very dark to pretty light.

[danmega]

Originally Posted by cool_kid23435

I'm going to make another thread with the three posts in a row because it's not very readable with all of the other posts in between

Why didn't you just do that originally?

But, that'll be one massive wall of text. too long, don't give a shit.

[cool_kid23435]

Originally Posted by danmega

Why didn't you just do that originally?

But, that'll be one massive wall of text. too long, don't give a shit.

because I didn't have time to post it all in one go, I had to come back and continue it. And maybe no one gives a shit, but I get locked in my room and have nothing better to do.