Forgetting their name!

[ZeroMalarki]

Fuck! Why do we do it. I know there's the reason "We're too busy trying to make a good impression that we focus on that rather than remembering". But still.. Curse our inability to remember the names of the most beautiful members of the opposite sex.

Tonight, I was out at a club with a few friends and this beautiful girl and her friend sat down beside us. My friends and I (two of them taken guys and two girls) sat and chatted some shit whilst these teenagers in drag came up and chatted to this gorgeous girl. Meanwhile the girl gives me the eyes. I play cool as if I'm the most pimping motherfucker you ever did meet, pouring myself glasses of champagne from a bottle of free plonk I won at the bar, meanwhile acting like stand up comedian of the year and making more laughs than you've had warm baths.

Finally the kids in drag leave and I move in, talking to her friend first and getting them to join our group. Then I talk to the girl and she pats the seat beside her, I play hard to get for a second then when I see she really wants me to, sit down. We chat, from what we're doing to music. She's really into David Bowie. I speak honestly with a slight sugarcoating telling her I only got into Bowie when I smoked something funny with an old hippy. She laughs saying that Bowie doesn't need that. I tell her the herb just enhances the music, quote a little Bill Hicks and she tells me she wishes everyone thought like that. We kiss and her friend drags her home. She tells me her name one last time and demands she adds me to facebook.

In my drunk happy and horny state I thought this was the ticket. A blue eyed, brilliantly breasted brunette that liked the blunt. So much alliteration that it had to be right. And I don't think I remember her name right. Linda? Louise? Lauren? Bills? Mills? Dirty little thrills? Fuck knows.

Maybe I'll find it out another time. Maybe I'll make up another rhyme, cover myself in slime and punch motherfuckers like I'm back in my prime. Put you to your grave, ask your friend Dave whos gonna make you the slave, chain round your throat, hung by the scroat, then I'll use your tongue to paint my boat. I'm listening to the wu-tang clan, freestyling falls into the plan. Whos the drunk whos spick and span?

TLDR: I'm fucked, and laughing at the fumblings of a drunken mind. Join me and think of all those people you called the wrong name, or just forgot the name of and were turned off or just got completely turned away from you. Then just laugh about it, or hope whilst getting on with things. Here's to the tit wank you may never receive *raises a glass of water in aid of sobering up*

[aquabania]

try suicide

[never]

Seriously get over yourself
and
murder/suicide
"More laughs than you've had warm baths", fucking die holy shit.

[Rocko]

It's easy, dude, just root through her purse and look for a license while she's in the can.

[ZeroMalarki]

Firstly, I should probably two things: I have a cockyness that I even put into posts, exagerating my greatness. I don't take myself too seriously, especially when I'm pissed. I'm Northern Irish, its what we do. Second of all only one of you added anything of worth to this thread, and that was about the drivers license.

Not a bad idea, but you can fix it better by getting them to introduce themselves to one of your friends. Its whenever they've gone and you can't remember their name because you're too drunk that it really stings. Thankfully, I asked a friend. I'm in with a chance..

[Cliche Guevara]

hahahaha why did the second last paragraph rhyme?

[Agent 008]

Write it down.

Seriously.

[Denver Max]

Wow, you have no reason to post cocky shit on S&A... you were popping bottles at a club, and somehow you end up alone, drunk, and posting shit on the internet. You don't have 'swag' so fuck off.

[psycho_8b]

Surely she can put her name and number into your phone. It's the 21st century...Every mother fucker and his brother seems to have a mobile these days.

[Ambient]

You know alcohol disinhibits thte mind and therefore the body. So things such as conversation are arguably improved whilst memory is degraded.

If she understands the nature of alcohol she will not think your forgetfulness as being indicative of disingenuity or being fake; only forgetful.

This is something one should expect in a club.

[NiggerBabyRocketLauncher]

One of your friends might've picked it up.

[Bonghoots]

Originally Posted by Denver Max

Wow, you have no reason to post cocky shit on S&A... you were popping bottles at a club, and somehow you end up alone, drunk, and posting shit on the internet. You don't have 'swag' so fuck off.

HAHAHA THIS!!!!

[ZeroMalarki]

Originally Posted by Denver Max

Wow, you have no reason to post cocky shit on S&A... you were popping bottles at a club, and somehow you end up alone, drunk, and posting shit on the internet. You don't have 'swag' so fuck off.

Granted, but my fault was chilling with friends rather than going all out warfare. Second paragraph rhymed because hell, I wanted to.

[THIS IS IMPORTANT GODDAMNIT]

So wait, did your inability to recall her name through all that articulate, carefully chosen language actually blow the deal, or are you just ranting about that for the sake of it?

Answer my post with rhymage, I demand it!

[ZeroMalarki]

Originally Posted by Captain_nonsense

So wait, did your inability to recall her name through all that articulate, carefully chosen language actually blow the deal, or are you just ranting about that for the sake of it?

Answer my post with rhymage, I demand it!

I'll spare you some time and answer your post in rhyme, in part I was moaning about my failings, writing lines about my train de-railings, I won't turn sour, I won't turn cold because truth be told, I was drunk as shit when I wrote that post, Should have munched on a piece of toast instead of choosing to boast about my inability or my God-given stupidity, but you see I go from up to down from peasant to crown throughout my life, someday I think about using the knife against my throat, others I'm the coolest man with the very large scroat, but back then I was on a rant, feeling more philosophical than Immanuel Kant, so don't forget to breath don't forget to pant because if you think twice then I'll fuck your aunt!

[daneel7]

...

[J.P.W]

You think forgetting names is bad? Forgetting faces is worse.

[arleybob]

ONE time my ex was eating all my pizza. She made a comment, something like: "Fuck, I can't stop eating."

I was all like, "Yeah, I wanna be the fat one!" It didn't come out right, to say the least.

And one time I was trying to serenade her with song because I was excited about our day. It had Johnny Cash-esque drawl to it. The first line was, "I'm gonna get drunk tonight... but not drunk enough to treat you right." That didn't come out right either. But I still got laid

[Lollygagger]

Back in my younger days, cell phones were still huge and not everyone had one, this one hot chick wrote her name on my hand with her number. Afterward I couldnt make out anything it said, her name or the number. That sucked.

Oh the best next day story I have is when I ended up at this chicks apartment, barely remember fucking her let alone her name. She asks me if I remember the next day, I do a quick scan of the room and see her diploma. Good thing it was hers.

[THIS IS IMPORTANT GODDAMNIT]

I don't know why this shit is bumped, but fuck, good reply, Zero