ITT: Excuses for me calling in sick to work.

[jiz]

Go!

[Fza]

It's sunday.

[Food Product]

Your brother has Lymphoma.


That's not an excuse, I'm his docter.

[Morb]

Tell them you got your dick stuck in the vacuum again.

Be careful using that excuse, though, I've found it only works about four or fives times before they start gettting suspicious.

[Issue313]

Originally Posted by Monso

Your brother has Lymphoma.

I have lymphoma, you insensitive dick.

Say you had to get a bone marrow biopsy.

[Clover]

Originally Posted by Issue313

I have lymphoma, you insensitive dick.

Say you had to get a bone marrow biopsy.

They'll probably ask for documentation/proof for such an outlandish claim.

[Issue313]

Originally Posted by Clover

They'll probably ask for documentation/proof for such an outlandish claim.

It involves drilling a hole into the bone just above and to the right of the ass crack. Social Welfare didn't want to see the scar. I tried using my heart operation to get out of a traffic ticket I got parking outside the second hand book shop, ripped open my shirt to show them the scar, they were impressed but wanted actual documentation. Yeah rite. I ignored the ticket and threats they sent me.

[Lord hang man]

Just kill your boss.

[CK-]

My friend used to call in brain cancer every other day to do coke with me. He got let go eventually, but he got to do all the ketamine he wanted at work and just sit there and drool in his cubicle.

[Euda]

Poop.

[Winston_Smith]

say that you have food poisoning.

[Dr Z Tream]

Originally Posted by Morb

Tell them you got your dick stuck in the vacuum again.

Be careful using that excuse, though, I've found it only works about four or fives times before they start gettting suspicious.

After a few times your boss may take you around back and show you some techniques so as to avoid the the vacuum entrapping your junk.