Pre-Employment Psychological Testing

[Death of Hope]

Has anyone else applied for multiple jobs using online applications and noticed the wide range of time-consuming, completely fucked-up, and totally wrong psychological tests you have to do before getting a job in the States?

Seriously. Most of the questions are no-brainers--"It's sometimes ok to take money from work" is a "strongly disagree." "I do my best when I work" is a "strongly agree."

But then there's the other completely fucked up shit that they ask.

"Other people's problems are their own business" was the first that threw me off. I kept saying I agreed with that statement, not only because I agree with it, but because I figured employers wouldn't want people who liked to poke in other people's business. How wrong I was. A manager told me it refers to caring about the customers' problems. What the fuck? Why not just ask that?

And now I've a new one that's puzzling my head. "I can easily tell what others are feeling/thinking." The hell?

Then there are the completely unrelated ones--why do they care if my social calendar is full, and what the hell am I supposed to say when they ask me if I've ever lied to my parents?

How's this shit legal?

[Junior Jacon Jeese Jurger]

I've got this shit on the past 3 applications I've filled out for warehouse jobs and its very annoying going through 60 questions of bullshit and then not even getting called for the job. Luckily it has paid off for doing all of that shit because I'm getting hired as a warehouse selector starting out at $14 an hour. Patience is the key.

[Death of Hope]

I have a job right now, but I'm trying to get a second one because they cut my hours, and I swear they've added even more bullshit since the last time.

The worst one actually had a question about whether I lean to the left or right politically. I swear that's got to be illegal to ask.

[PuttinOnTheRitz]

shit is stupid brah

[Bitch Tits]

yo death of hope u got nipple pics? i heard u a girl

[Euda]

Psychological testing for jobs can get pretty intense, or it can be a breeze. It all depends on the sort of job.

I thought the employment testing for Fairmont was hilarious. "Do you smile"? "Do you smile more than the average person"? etc.

[not me]

I took a pre-employment psych test (maybe 300 questions) which asked some odd questions such as "Do you love your Mother ?". The company said that they only hired 2% of those who took the test. (They hired me.) The joke among the employees was that the top 2% got hired and the top 1% go on to become serial killers. ;-]

[Mr. Dazed and Confused]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

I have a job right now, but I'm trying to get a second one because they cut my hours, and I swear they've added even more bullshit since the last time.

The worst one actually had a question about whether I lean to the left or right politically. I swear that's got to be illegal to ask.

sounds pretty illegal.

http://www.eeoc.gov/facts/qanda.html

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by Mr. Dazed and Confused

sounds pretty illegal.

http://www.eeoc.gov/facts/qanda.html

The sad part is the company that hired me is the one with the political question on its test. I'm not sure if it's still there or not, but I was told by several locations that I'd "failed" the test, but this one hired me.

I don't think it was the political question, though, because everyone around here seems to think Obama is the second coming of Christ.

[Hi-Guy]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

The worst one actually had a question about whether I lean to the left or right politically. I swear that's got to be illegal to ask.

That sucks, because of all places in the United States, only Washington D.C., New York, and Puerto Rico have laws to bar discrimination on a political basis. There is no federal law.

[NoSkills]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

"I can easily tell what others are feeling/thinking." The hell?

It's a measure of empathy. Depending on the job, they'd probably want empathetic people.

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by Hi-Guy

That sucks, because of all places in the United States, only Washington D.C., New York, and Puerto Rico have laws to bar discrimination on a political basis. There is no federal law.

Well, they hired me, so someone must have liked my politics, or mustn't have cared. To be honest, I don't think my manager can read well enough to analyze psych test results.

I just don't talk politics with anyone, so I can't be fired for my views. Well, I did try to explain to several of my coworkers that the significance of the White House "party crashers" had more to do with the President's security than "a few white folks going to a party," but I gave up pretty quickly.

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by NoSkills

It's a measure of empathy. Depending on the job, they'd probably want empathetic people.

Yeah, I'd been answering "yes" to that one.

But what about ones where it's so definite, like, "I've never lied to my parents." Or, worse, "I've never done anything that I regret." Obvously, nobody wants liars to be employed by them, but are they trying to detect liars by picking out the people who refused to admit that they've lied to their parents, or that they have a regret or two? I mean, who hasn't lied to their parents?

[Method of Madness]

I hate those damn tests, I have to do a 400 question one on the 20th

I always ace them but they are just annoying.

The most amusing longer questions I can remember where something like

Johnny smokes a joint of marijuana to relieve his stress. He has work in an hour and a half and decides to go. Do you disagree,somewhat disagree, somewhat agree or agree?

Joe works at a grocery store, he is very poverty stricken. He knows where the stores cameras are and decides to steal food to feed his family. Was it justifiable?Do you disagree,somewhat disagree, somewhat agree or agree?

[LiquidIce]

Ah, yes, I must find some cheats to this because Best Buy and McDonalds haven't even called me back. Ever

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by Vanilla Guerilla

I hate those damn tests, I have to do a 400 question one on the 20th

I always ace them but they are just annoying.

The most amusing longer questions I can remember where something like

Johnny smokes a joint of marijuana to relieve his stress. He has work in an hour and a half and decides to go. Do you disagree,somewhat disagree, somewhat agree or agree?

Joe works at a grocery store, he is very poverty stricken. He knows where the stores cameras are and decides to steal food to feed his family. Was it justifiable?Do you disagree,somewhat disagree, somewhat agree or agree?

If these ones were that easy, we'd be acing them. These are the very vague, one sentence ones, where 75% of the questions are no-brainers, like, "It's ok to use prescription drugs recreationally," and, "I like to swear a lot." And the others seem completely unrelated.

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by LiquidIce

Ah, yes, I must find some cheats to this because Best Buy and McDonalds haven't even called me back. Ever

Yeah, same shit here! I'm doing something wrong, I just don't know what it is.

An interesting note on Best Buy's: I helped a friend, who isn't computer literate, do a Best Buy application today for a security guard position. He's not a high school graduate. The psych test is different--it omits a few of the questions about how you performed in school, most notably the "I thought seriously of dropping out" one, and adds more extremely obvious shit. Of course, this only works if you want to pretend you're a dropout.

Secondly, when you get to the tax credit section, the "work opportunity credit" section is longer. It asks what grade you dropped out in, if you completed middle school, etc. So, apparently, they must get some tax credits for hiring dropouts?

I'm waiting to see if he gets a callback or not.

[DJ Meaty Cheeks]

Its for companies too lazy/cheap/stupid to interview.

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by Alpheus

Its for companies too lazy/cheap/stupid to interview.

Yes, and it's shocking that nobody has come out and cracked these tests from top to bottom online. All I've found is speculation like what we have here.

[kayx]

For some reason I can't pass those tests. I've tried many ways, giving my "truthful" answers (how I actually feel about the questions), giving them the answers I think they want, answering randomly...I can't do it.

At this point I just hire someone to take them for me...

Fuck
Those
Tests.

[Death of Hope]

I had a boyfriend do one for me once and I actually got a callback. Apparently the key to the New Zealand fast food ones is you just say you'll serve rotten/cold/out of date food.

[ComradeAsh]

ALT + X

[mrparks]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

..Why not just ask that?

Because you would lie. They want to beat around in the bush a little bit and see what flies out. Coming at you sideways. Cross reference your answers and give you a rating.

And now I've a new one that's puzzling my head. "I can easily tell what others are feeling/thinking." The hell?

Unless you have a reason to believe that they are testing you to see if you present with any sort of super-human abilities, then why not say yes? Especially if it smacks of touchy-feely bullshit.

Then there are the completely unrelated ones--why do they care if my social calendar is full, and what the hell am I supposed to say when they ask me if I've ever lied to my parents?

Dishonesty towards authority figures would obviously be frowned on.

I suppose the social calender could pertain to how well you socialize with people, or how much time you have to work. Would your lunch date with friends prevent you from taking on another shift?

Work first, always and forever.

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by mrparks

Because you would lie. They want to beat around in the bush a little bit and see what flies out. Coming at you sideways. Cross reference your answers and give you a rating.

With the "I care about the problems of others" thing, I guess I'm overanalyzing. Because whenever I read that statement, it smacks of, "I'm a bleeding heart pussy who will give out a free hotel room to every pretty girl with a sad story." So, on my first round of job applications, I said I didn't give a shit about the problems of others. Three different times per application.

I think with that question, it should, in fact, be job specific, and there needs to be some qualifier that makes it clear that they mean solving people's problems where they're related to whatever service you're providing--like giving someone a toothbrush when they forgot one.

But maybe I'm wrong. Everyone else seems to have got that one the first time.

Unless you have a reason to believe that they are testing you to see if you present with any sort of super-human abilities, then why not say yes? Especially if it smacks of touchy-feely bullshit.

Once again, I just don't get why they want touchy-feely people. They ought to be looking for people who will DO THE FUCKING JOB. The place I work now has too many touchy-feely bleeding heart emo kiddies who can't do their job properly because they don't want to offend people.

Dishonesty towards authority figures would obviously be frowned on.

Of course. But if you choose the extreme response--that is, you've never lied to your parents, wouldn't you be tagged as lying? Are there really people out there who haven't lied to their parents?

I suppose the social calender could pertain to how well you socialize with people, or how much time you have to work. Would your lunch date with friends prevent you from taking on another shift?

Work first, always and forever.

See, that's what I'm getting at--you don't know which one it is.

The more I talk about this shit, the more I think it should be illegal, and wonder why there hasn't been a test case for it yet. I think it violates, among other things, the Americans with Disabilities Act.

[mrparks]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

With the "I care about the problems of others" thing, I guess I'm overanalyzing.

What would The Company do? Would they prefer that you jump in front of a bus to make their customers feel happier and more inclined to come back?

Of course they would.

So, you tell them that you'd do anything for a customer. If there is a scale on the questions between (Strongly disagree, Disagree, Neutral, Agree, Strongly Agree) answer to either extreme. If you go "neutral" you get zero points for the question.

The payoff for getting it right outweighs the chance of you getting it wrong.

I think with that question, it should, in fact, be job specific, and there needs to be some qualifier that makes it clear that they mean solving people's problems where they're related to whatever service you're providing--like giving someone a toothbrush when they forgot one.

It would be job specific if they wanted someone that could do one job, but they want the flexible sort.

But maybe I'm wrong. Everyone else seems to have got that one the first time.

Well, you're not "wrong". You're just a few personality points short.

Once again, I just don't get why they want touchy-feely people. They ought to be looking for people who will DO THE FUCKING JOB.

Unless your job is smacking gophers with a mallet, there is going to be people around you. The more of a "people person" you are ON PAPER, the better.

So lie. Pretend to be someone else. Whatever gets you employed. They can fire you later.

If you choose the extreme response--that is, you've never lied to your parents, wouldn't you be tagged as lying? Are there really people out there who haven't lied to their parents?

All in the subtext. As I said above, go for broke. How could you strongly agree/disagree to whether or not you've lied to your parents?

They do not care about your parents. Just tell them what they want to hear. Which in this case, is all about how you treat your superiors. (EDIT: Actually, I think this is a control question to base the accuracy off of. By assuming that everyone lies to their parents, the wrong answer becomes the assumed positive. So, the answer should be "agree".

I still think that they would prefer you put work before friends (as pertaining to your social calender)

If they ask about people, you're with people. If they make you decide between work and people, you're with work.

The more I talk about this shit, the more I think it should be illegal, and wonder why there hasn't been a test case for it yet. I think it violates, among other things, the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Far as I can tell, your only disability is that you do not test well.

Read this.

[LiquidIce]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

Yeah, same shit here! I'm doing something wrong, I just don't know what it is.

An interesting note on Best Buy's: I helped a friend, who isn't computer literate, do a Best Buy application today for a security guard position. He's not a high school graduate. The psych test is different--it omits a few of the questions about how you performed in school, most notably the "I thought seriously of dropping out" one, and adds more extremely obvious shit. Of course, this only works if you want to pretend you're a dropout.

Secondly, when you get to the tax credit section, the "work opportunity credit" section is longer. It asks what grade you dropped out in, if you completed middle school, etc. So, apparently, they must get some tax credits for hiring dropouts?

I'm waiting to see if he gets a callback or not.

I'll try out and research this test topic, because it's really getting to me. I've work general labor, I've worked as a salesman, and while I agree I wasn't the best salesman, I did my job honestly and the best I could do, despite me completely lacking experience and being quite introverted.

Gah, will try again, I need a job desperately by the end of Jan with at least 200$ per week and I'm willing to do 60 hours for this.

[Hi-Guy]

Here's one someone told me they encountered when applying at Target:

It is okay to move office supplies off the store premises.

How fucking vague is that? What if you were told to transfer supplies from one store to another (and according to some acquaintances, this situation happens occasionally, albeit informally)?

This person who applied actually managed to advance to an interview where his response was questioned again. The interviewer said he was to treat that question in terms of employee theft.

He contested it with a reason similar to one I just wrote. He said the interviewer agreed, but he still didn't get the job.

[Death of Hope]

MrParks: I actually read that article during my first round of interviews. If employers actually think through everything stated in the article, ie they believe a high social desirability score indicates potential cheating, my worries about saying "agree" to things like, "I've never lied to my parents" are well-founded.

Anyway, I have one job. I just need another to pay my bills unless I can trick this company into giving me more hours or moving me into management.

What's really struck me is the dymanic nature of these tests--the questions now are different than the ones I took 3 months ago, even for the same employers.

As for whether I'm a "good" test taker or not, I was a straight A student and an excellent test taker in school. Maybe that works against me here; this is the first type of test I've had trouble with, and it's just plain maddening.

[not me]

If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be ?

[Rocko]

Just another way to disqualify you. Honestly, you have to jump through so many hoops with internet applications that I don't even bother, I do everything in person. I'm sure at least 50% of those questions have an answer that triggers the automatic deletion of your application, so statistically speaking it's not worth the time to try and get through the system.

Besides, if the company is going to do a fuckin psychological profile before they even interview you, they'll probably be shitty to work for.

[kayx]

Originally Posted by not me

If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be ?

What's the difference between a duck?

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by Rocko

Just another way to disqualify you. Honestly, you have to jump through so many hoops with internet applications that I don't even bother, I do everything in person. I'm sure at least 50% of those questions have an answer that triggers the automatic deletion of your application, so statistically speaking it's not worth the time to try and get through the system.

Besides, if the company is going to do a fuckin psychological profile before they even interview you, they'll probably be shitty to work for.

Well, sometimes you don't get a choice who you work for; some of us have to jump through the hoops because there aren't any jobs in what we trained for, or because we have no experience at anything that's on offer.

I have three college degrees, almost no work history, and I applied everywhere before finding a job. 99% of the companies didn't bother calling me back. Of the ones who did, I had about 10 interviews, was told I was grossly overqualified 10 times, begged pathetically, and was offered two jobs in the end. I chose the higher paying of the two (they were in different cities) and am now trying to find a second job because the first one doesn't make ends meet.

So, yeah, no choices here.

[kayx]

fuck it, I'm too drunk...here's the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XegNtdRySnY

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by kXanon

fuck it, I'm too drunk...here's the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XegNtdRySnY

That would be hilarious if I hadn't had to fill out like 15 stupid surveys today.

[LiquidIce]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

That would be hilarious if I hadn't had to fill out like 15 stupid surveys today.

I just watched that movie now.

And anyways, it seems I must have hit the right answers, because I got a reply from the company, went to an interview and were chosen to attend orientation in a few days time, which, I think, means I've got the job?

[Hammer Tank]

Originally Posted by Death of Hope

was told I was grossly overqualified 10 times

i never understood this. "sir, your qualifications are excellent. unfortunately, we are looking for someone with a drinking problem."

on topic though, these tests are terrible and I support cheating them. I wish there was a leak online or something.

[Rocko]

Originally Posted by LiquidIce

I just watched that movie now.

And anyways, it seems I must have hit the right answers, because I got a reply from the company, went to an interview and were chosen to attend orientation in a few days time, which, I think, means I've got the job?

Never assume you have the job until your health insurance takes effect. I went through a whole application, interview, orientation, and brief training process at my last job, only to be told less than a month in (in the middle of a fucking shift) that I was being laid off because they couldn't afford another $8.50 employee.

Even if he shakes your hand, says "We look forward to working with you for years to come", gives you a nametag, a desk, and your own red Swingline, never assume you have a stable job.

[LiquidIce]

Originally Posted by Rocko

Never assume you have the job until your health insurance takes effect. I went through a whole application, interview, orientation, and brief training process at my last job, only to be told less than a month in (in the middle of a fucking shift) that I was being laid off because they couldn't afford another $8.50 employee.

Even if he shakes your hand, says "We look forward to working with you for years to come", gives you a nametag, a desk, and your own red Swingline, never assume you have a stable job.

Holy shitfuck. I gotta make sure the boss sees me workin' cause I really need this job. It's life or death! Or actually, it's gonna fund my 3-month long drinking, fucking, travelling dream soon to come.

[Hi-Guy]

Originally Posted by Hammer Tank

I wish there was a leak online or something.

Consumerist leaked one of Best Buy's HR's Geek Squad interview manuals ("Counter-intelligence", specifically) in a pdf somewhere. When I saw it, it was literally a step-by-step no deviation process. It pretty much told the interviewer when to sit down, take notes, ask questions, goals (something along the lines of "Instruct the interviewee that this job requires 51% customer relations and 49% technical knowledge")

Nevermind. Consumerist no longer hosts it.

[Death of Hope]

Originally Posted by Rocko

Never assume you have the job until your health insurance takes effect. I went through a whole application, interview, orientation, and brief training process at my last job, only to be told less than a month in (in the middle of a fucking shift) that I was being laid off because they couldn't afford another $8.50 employee.

Even if he shakes your hand, says "We look forward to working with you for years to come", gives you a nametag, a desk, and your own red Swingline, never assume you have a stable job.

You found an $8.50 an hour job with health insurance?!!!