Problems with Amphetamines (Ritilan, Concerta, Adderall)
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Granted, these few prescribed medications are good for when you want a buzz, have to study for a test, or have to work a whole day and need to concerta. But there is an enormous downside.
Once I turned 18 I was going and getting my prescriptions on my own even though I was still living with my parents (remember that part, it'll be important later). So I had 30 pills of a drug that will keep me awake as long as I need, I thought it was great, I had 2 jobs at the time, trying to pay for random debts that I had gotten myself into.
I have been taking prescription "uppers" since I was 6, but I never knew how much they actually helped me work, or focus. So the first day after I worked each of my jobs, giving away 16 hours of my life. I took one. Feeling good, motivated, jittery, I thought it was great, I was a waiter at the time, and I had never done better at my job than that day. Then I went to go do my construction part of my painful day, and again, took another pill. Which also again, made me work amazingly... Then night time came, and I wanted to go out and drink. As everyone knows, just like old school, once it touches your lips, it's addicting. I got wasted that night. Until 4 AM in the morning, and had to wake up at 8. So I thought, just take another pill... It won't hurt
So I did it, took another pill, stayed up all night, went to work, and did the same, wonderful at my job. Made more money than usual. Then went to my laborer job in construction and did the same thing taking another pill.
This went on and on for about a week, and I thought I was doing so "awesome" that I would pick up more hours on both of my jobs... So I did, I was working 40 hour weeks as a waiter and 45 hours weeks in construction, doing fine.
Now how much I took, got a little crazy, after I ran out of the pills I had by prescription, I bought them black market, but this story is not about addiction, you'll see soon what it's about, I go on tangents, because I'm on Dexedrine now...
So for 6 days a week, I worked the hardest I have ever, spending most of that extra money on speed. I would always get a little sleep it would keep me sane....
the bad part
there was one week, both of my jobs needed me. I had to work 74 hours in 5 days, painstaking if you've ever been in that position...
This might sound stupid, but I stayed up for 5 days, just trying to get myself through work. I'll tell you why now that I only lasted 3.
In 5 days, I took thirty, 36 mg concert, which is time release, since I had to work so hard, I was taking 2 at a time. I wasn't eating, everyone who does uppers knows that food makes you feel sick thinking about it.
After 2 days, of not eating, and not sleeping. I began to be spun *** (spun means crazy, delirious, not knowing reality from real life...) For those of you who still don't know what I'm talking about, it'll get a little technical - The left side of my brain (rationality) since it had been working for so long, and nonstop. Had fallen asleep, while I was still awake. I was dreaming while fully awake. Tripping, hallucinating. And now knowing it because I just thought I was trying to work hard. I began seeing waves in everything I looked at, similar to the waves you see on poisonous mushrooms, or LSD. I began to trip hard, and not like a regular trip, I would see people, that would talk to me. I know it is hard to believe this, because it is a prescription drug.............
My insanity/hospital trip
It turns out, in 2 weeks, I took enough speed to kill anyone. I took 2 1/2 months worth (FOR THE AMATEURS THAT'S 75 pills) in half a month. That's 5 times the dosage for the mathematically retarded.
I felt bad. Like a high that I never wanted to feel. I saw a clip on the news about the West Nile virus, then went looking around the house with bug spray in case of mosquitos. I was "spun," I had bitten off more than I could chew, and I figured it out, and tried to fix it.
me being an idiot!!!!!!!
I heard once that if you don't eat food and stay away for 3 days, you will trip, and it'll be great. So I thought that was what might be happening. So I ate, I couldn't eat much, it was just a piece of pizza, making up for now 3 days of not eating. I had a piece of pizza, some water, and a downer which I bought for 5 of them for 6 bucks because I was in that much dire need of it. I downed it all, and went to sleep for 35 hours, and lost my construction job because I skipped 2 shifts without calling in. But at that time I didn't care, I was just trying to be sane...
Don't worry, this story will end very soon
So I got some much needed sleep.
I think that sounds like the end, I slept and then felt better. But it got worse once I slept. I mixed uppers and downers. To try and fix seeing things I shouldn't, by just taking too much speed. This is where it gets crazy.
I went to sleep on a Sunday, early morning around 5, and I had to go to my construction site at 6. Obviously, since I already told you I lost that job, and slept for 45 hours, I missed my shift. I slept all through Monday, wasting my day. All through Tuesday, getting me in trouble as my occupation as a server. And woke up early Tuesday morning (Being on the dot. I woke up Wednesday, at 2 o'clock in the morning) And that was the day, that I had to wake up and go into my construction job early, So that I could finish 10% of the drywall in the base room of the entrance, so that the general manager of the store it was going to be, would be pleased.
So I got up, and got ready for work. Not feeling myself at all....
I felt like I had taken too much acid and ecstasy at the same time. I was bumping into walls in my house and not feeling it. And seeing people that I knew weren't there. I saw a couple of my friends while I was on my way to the bathroom. Stopped midway, then called them and asked why they left so soon. My friend was asleep, once I called he said "Go to hell." I wish he just would have asked if I was on drugs, because then I would have realized, what exactly was happening.
FINAL CHAPTER: INSANITY
I was in the shower, and I don't know exactly when I got out of control. But I remember seeing something about the cold war on TV, within the last week. I began thinking about Russian spies. And then suddenly, the random people I saw, that were my friends. Weren't anyone I knew at all. I thought that people were watching me from my backyard (My backyard is woods, my deck, and not a house for miles). So I, being fearless, insane, and not know if these "people" were friendly or not. Went out and tried to greet them. At first, on Wednesday, around 3:15 in the morning. I thought they were a bunch of kids playing paint ball. I had paintball equipment, So I put it all on, and went out into the woods, and hid, waiting for them. Thinking that overtime I shot at a tree, or the sound of water that had taken a form of a person in my mind. That I was winning. I was out in my own backyard, cheering, yelling, shooting paintballs at nothing... I was having a good time, I didn't think twice about what was happening. No one ever plays paintball at 3:25 AM in their backyard with kids they don't know. But since I thought that I was. I felt like a kid again...
Then my mom came outside around 5:00 AM and found me...
She flipped! She thought I was on drugs. Once she came outside and started yelling I don't know if it was that I came to and noticed what was going on. Or if I was just playing off how I felt. But I talked her out of thinking I was inebriated, and told her I was just having target practice. Hitting trees because I was going to be in a paintball tournament that coming weekend, and I had to be ready. She never knew much about my life, I was either at work or out getting wasted. So she believed me. Then she left for work, leaving me alone, spun, at a house where I was already chasing people that weren't there...
I went inside and got ready for work, I took 3 more pills so I could do it, I figured it wouldn't harm me, I just got so much sleep. Well, those 3 pills probably didn't do a damn thing to me. But I began thinking about the spy thing. Thinking that people were watching me. I was looking outside a window or behind my back every 5 seconds. And hearing sounds. Then I thought someone was breaking into my house.
I went out on my deck, and looked. I saw 5 distinctly different faces of people hiding in the woods. In camouflage, face paint. All of them staring at me... So I tried to ignore it, why would anyone want to spy on an 18 year old who's only crime is doing drugs. But the thought was still in the back of my mind...
Still on my mind but not enough to annoy me that I wouldn't go to work that day. Now remember, I had to go into work early, to finish the job on the entrance of the pharmacy, and I came in late, looking cracked out, and feeling paranoid. Guess what? I got fired that day, and then got sent home. I thought that was great, a day off of work, maybe I'll go out, or just sit in and relax... But once i got home the same things were happening
Granted, they were happening before I left, on the ride to work, and during work... But once I got home, I was having the same trip... People in my backyard watching me, So I went to sleep as soon as I could...
Waking up to 3 people I didn't know, that might've been watching me sleep...
Olga, Frank, and James.
Olga was a beautiful blonde, who was a supermodel in Russia. Frank and James were her body guards. They were staking out my house to see if it was a good place to hide. All this went on for 7 hours ... we talked, watched TV, I made food for them. And I thought it was all real.
Then my step dad came home. I had a whole table set for 4 people. I drank a glass of water during this 7 hour period ... there were 3 other full glasses of water on the kitchen counter. He asked what it was all for, and I said there was company in the house ... he asked who and I told him flat out ... everything. A Russian supermodel and her bodyguards...
where are they
Not sure, they were just here
My step dad thought I was joking, laughed it off.
Then I went downstairs in my basement while he was watching TV and he heard loud voices, well not voices, just me. Talking to no one ... and he asked me who was there, and started coming down the stairs. In my mind, the 3 Russians ran off, said they hated my dad. So I told him that too, that they didn't like him.
That's when he got worried. They wouldn't come back in the house after that, so I was then outside talking to them, we played hide & seek. My step dad by that time (which was around when my mother came home) Was already way too drunk. So he didn't have a worry in the world. But once my mom saw me out back, talking to people that weren't there, and running around looking under trees and bushes ... she called the police ... it took me 4 days to regain consciousness and notice that I was crazy...
Use amphetamines, they help you work and stay awake... DON'T ABUSE, I haven't been the same since that week.