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View Full Version : How can I fuck my english teacher?


Quad-Consonant
2007-10-12, 03:19
Ok, so in a few months I'm going on a trip with my English teacher to Orlando Florida for this Vocabulary Bee. My teacher is 28 years old, not married and a fucking fox.

The only people on the trip are me and her, so I'm going to feel like a total loser if I don't nail her.

So, I'm asking you guys, how should I go about doing this? Should I gradually start coming on to her or just go into her room at the hotel and with nothing but my boxers on and a wood? I'm just about totally clueless, but this would make a great story to tell my friends, who are pretty much saying even now that I fail at life if I don't manage to fuck her.

Special. K
2007-10-12, 03:23
Attraction, comfort, seduction.
You'll be experiencing quite a bit of token resistance I'd imagine, considering you're her student and she's putting herself in a very risky situation, as if having sex isn't risky enough of a social implication as it is.

You better have some serious game bro, or i'd say you've got not a shot in hell.

Are you good with torrents/warez? Pick yourself up a copy of The Mystery Method/The Venusian Arts Handbook, and soak up game, asap.

EssJay
2007-10-12, 03:34
You see, when a man loves a woman... (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_intercourse#In_humans)

FON
2007-10-12, 03:36
Good luck, soldier.

suissemista
2007-10-12, 03:48
I definitely wouldn't just go charging into her room with a hardon, that will freak her the fuck out. Just be extra witty, give her plenty of compliments (not too heavily/creepy) , tell her that she looks tense and that you have been told that you are good at giving massages and ask if you can give her one. Take it from there, just read her body language as you're laying on the compliments and if you get as far as massaging her i'd say you've got your foot in the door.

ghx
2007-10-12, 04:14
Wait...... How old are you?

Special. K
2007-10-12, 04:30
I definitely wouldn't just go charging into her room with a hardon, that will freak her the fuck out. Just be extra witty, give her plenty of compliments (not too heavily/creepy) , tell her that she looks tense and that you have been told that you are good at giving massages and ask if you can give her one. Take it from there, just read her body language as you're laying on the compliments and if you get as far as massaging her i'd say you've got your foot in the door.

And what if she doesn't allow such closeness straight off the cuff? Contingency plan? If she's a fox like OP mentions then she'll have average nice guys coming up and complimenting her on shit all the time, last thing she will want is a student to start laying on that act.

phmeworp
2007-10-12, 04:57
I'm just about totally clueless,

I think this pretty much sums it all up. If it means that much to you to look like the total schoolyard stud, just make up a good story (read: much, much better than your original post) and share that with your other 12 y/o buddies.

If there is any chance of anything happening (and, to be honest, such things DO happen more than 'society' would want to ever acknowlege) it will be upon her initiation. Just keep your eyes and ears open, with something of an objective view. Just keep it low key on your part, or you might just get a good spanking!

bgcoolv
2007-10-12, 05:02
major props to you if you pull it off

but ya...how old are you? the older the better obviously.

if u 2 can somehow get ur drink on that would help cuz then her 'true' feelings come out

Starsword
2007-10-12, 05:17
Ignore the above, getting her drunk will only result in bad things later. Be objective and look out for signals and hints. Make a FEW subtle hints of your own, just two or three, you can't lay it on too thick or you'll drown in it. But yeah, it'll probably be at her initiation if at all.
Best of luck, fellow.

Uh
2007-10-12, 05:24
Ok, so in a few months I'm going on a trip with my English teacher to Orlando Florida for this Vocabulary Bee. My teacher is 28 years old, not married and a fucking fox.

The only people on the trip are me and her, so I'm going to feel like a total loser if I don't nail her.

So, I'm asking you guys, how should I go about doing this? Should I gradually start coming on to her or just go into her room at the hotel and with nothing but my boxers on and a wood? I'm just about totally clueless, but this would make a great story to tell my friends, who are pretty much saying even now that I fail at life if I don't manage to fuck her.

For starters you're an ugly piece of shit, good luck.

Legato
2007-10-12, 05:25
If you are a senior and/or 18, this will greatly benifit your cause.. just because of the whole possibility of being accused of rape, and the awkwardness of having to see you in the halls for a few years to come is elminated. I'm not the best looking guy but I'm not bad.. I date pretty attractive women in my opinion. I actually had sex with a teachers aide my junior year.. she was helping out and some days filling in to get experience in the teaching field.. it was all apart of her college course.. but yea.. met her one night at a party near the end of the year.. things kinda happened.. fortunately there was only two days left for her to aide in my U.S History class and one of those days I wasnt there.. but for one day.. well.. it was just interesting... you can imagine the question smirks, stares, and hand jesters.. and all my friends are of course oblivious.. I never told out of respect for her and her dream to become a teacher.. We still talk from time to time.. engaged now though..

Anyways.. the point.. this happens far more often than people would expect to believe.. Hell, we can't keep a football coach because this same girl fucks everyone of them.. they get nervous and leave.. lol

OrganizedChaos
2007-10-17, 02:16
You have to remember, she is in charge of whether or not you pass this year. Don't mess up.

LazerViperMouth
2007-10-17, 04:09
I'm suprised nobody posted anything about that the OP is just another 12 year old who thinks he can seduce his teacher.

faze2
2007-10-17, 04:11
Take her to Disney Quest, and have her suck your dick on the virtual rollercoaster!!!!

Minority Deport
2007-10-17, 04:28
Make jokes about sex to try to make her laugh, be innocent about it, not creepy.

Otherwise I'd have to be in the situation

bgcoolv
2007-10-17, 06:10
if u 2 can somehow get ur drink on that would help cuz then her 'true' feelings come out

Ignore the above, getting her drunk will only result in bad things later. Be objective and look out for signals and hints. Make a FEW subtle hints of your own, just two or three, you can't lay it on too thick or you'll drown in it. But yeah, it'll probably be at her initiation if at all.
Best of luck, fellow.

when i said that, in no way did i mean get her wasted and take advantage...if u need that to get laid then its sad
but i've been with girls which at first act like they arent interested but talk alot, then when they drink (even if im not around) they'll call and tell me they really wanna c me blah blah blah

ScaryDangerous
2007-10-17, 06:23
first off.

im ashamed at totse for this but...

PICS.


2nd, how cool is she? and yeh, if you're in college (which I doubt, because colleges shouldnt host spelling bee events, neither does high school) but if you are in college, and old enough to drink, suggest a drink to calm your nerves and ask her to join, if you guys seem to really hit it off, then it wont be too hard, if she's really cool, suggest a small drinking game. anyways, good luck, and dont forget the pics. and yes, this does happen once in a while, way more then people give credit for, BUT way less often then a high school teenager dating a MILF.

gadzooks
2007-10-17, 07:15
This will fail epically.

Dude, nowadays, any female who would risk her career, freedom, AND reputation, just for a one night fling, would have to be absolutely retarded.

Trust me, I have very little faith in woman-kind, but even this I wouldn't expect of them. It's just complete social/career suicide.


who are pretty much saying even now that I fail at life if I don't manage to fuck her.

Yeah, I'm sure any one of your friends could pull this off too.

It's quite obvious by your unrealistic expectations, and by the immaturity of your friends, that you aren't that old. Which means that your chances are yet even lower.

But, by all means, if you think you can pull it off, then you really have nothing to lose in trying. She's the one risking everything if she goes for it. The worst that will happen to you is maybe a few moments of embarrassment and some awkwardness in the future.

Numberjumbo
2007-10-17, 07:37
Pix of your teacher.

ScaryDangerous
2007-10-17, 07:41
share your juice box with her.

Splam
2007-10-17, 08:32
If you are a senior and/or 18, this will greatly benifit your cause.. just because of the whole possibility of being accused of rape

If anyone can be accused of rape it's the teacher. I'm pretty sure sex with a teacher is illegal in any circumstance, whether he's above 18 or not, and if you say she threatened to fail you if you didn't have sex, and have proof that sex took place, the court will most likely believe you no matter what. Sex her, then sue her. Win win situation, and if she's a fox you'll be the most popular kid at school.

i poop in your cereal
2007-10-17, 08:58
Huge amount of sleeping pills/Blunt object to the face.

Both works wonders.

genericwittyusername
2007-10-17, 09:18
I definitely wouldn't just go charging into her room with a hardon, that will freak her the fuck out.

I'm assuming your at maximum a sophomore in high school.

Your posting on totse trying to seduce a 28 year old teacher with whom you're going on a school sponsored intellectual extra-curricular trip. Chances are, you've got no chance on pulling someone that age unless you've pulled someone that age who IS NOT YOUR TEACHER.

Unless she's into younger dudes and you do exactly what swuissemista said you shouldn't do, you've got no chance. Masturbate about it if you want, but it ain't happenin'.

Hebejeebes
2007-10-17, 09:20
i know a guy who did a HS teacher and sued the district for a pretty nice sum of money. :D he did so by being himself. if your trying all sort of gimmicks and the like. best scenario you will just look desperate worst case you can get ??arrested?? for sexual harassment. learn simple attraction and remember its just another girl and approach the same as you should any other person.

it help if your good looking and not 12 but nothing is impossible i suppose. goodluck.

oh yea ..........

PICS or GTFO

ComradeAsh
2007-10-17, 12:41
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v676/ComradeAsh/coitus_mri_lg.jpg

Do this!

Caoltan
2007-10-17, 13:02
I definitely give her plenty of compliments, tell her that she looks tense and that you have been told that you are good at giving massages and ask if you can give her one.


Do NOT do this. Seriously - epic fail if you do. Download some David DeAngelo torrents and start studying and practicing NOW!

yoyobek
2007-10-17, 15:34
Creepy.

What sort of school trip is it where one pupil travels alone with one teacher?


Dont do it. You wont be a failure if you dont fuck this woman, she's a teacher for gods sake.
As someone said, she'd be daft to risk destroying her career for one kid. And chances are, you arent that kid.

She may be hot, but she's in an important position of trust.She wont do anything and if she did..well..

Splam
2007-10-17, 19:38
Creepy.

What sort of school trip is it where one pupil travels alone with one teacher?


Dont do it. You wont be a failure if you dont fuck this woman, she's a teacher for gods sake.
As someone said, she'd be daft to risk destroying her career for one kid. And chances are, you arent that kid.

She may be hot, but she's in an important position of trust.She wont do anything and if she did..well..

Shut up woman, this is nothing you'd ever be able to understand. He'll regret this for the rest of his life if he doesn't atleast try, especially if he develops a teacher fetish later on. It's a trust thing which is the whole point.

DesertRebel
2007-10-17, 20:25
You see, when a man loves a woman... (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_intercourse#In_humans)


Wait wait wait! Back up here! The dick goes into the big inviting hole not the one that seems a bit tighter!?

No one girls keep screaming and kicking me in the nuts...

yoyobek
2007-10-17, 20:34
Shut up woman, this is nothing you'd ever be able to understand. He'll regret this for the rest of his life if he doesn't atleast try, especially if he develops a teacher fetish later on. It's a trust thing which is the whole point.

On the contrary. Stupid crushes on teachers?
He was so hot.. :(

Bad idea. BAD IDEA

TruthWielder
2007-10-17, 23:22
Shut up woman, this is nothing you'd ever be able to understand. He'll regret this for the rest of his life if he doesn't atleast try, especially if he develops a teacher fetish later on. It's a trust thing which is the whole point.

wow, you must have lived all your life with you hand in your pants and chained by your neck to a stack of porno.

Trust me OP, you'll survive if you dont fuck her. And frankly, the way you express yourself (really immaturely) pretty much makes the odds 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 to 1.

robinhoody
2007-10-17, 23:34
Alcohol for both of you.

Enough to get her plastered and drastically lower both her inhibitions and morals, and enough for you to be able to "blame the booze" when you wake up together, but not so much that it hinders your performance.

reborn thief
2007-10-18, 00:52
Win the vocab bee or what ever. Take her out to dinner for being such a "great teacher" get her lots and lots of wine. Bring her back to hotel.

Post pics of her now and when your bangin her

averageBT
2007-10-18, 01:01
insert penis into vagina, there.

Achilles Armour
2007-10-18, 03:57
I love how this can only be attempted in Florida. Haha Where else?

NEPHROSIS
2007-10-18, 05:08
My advice -

If you're sitting next to her on the plane then perfect. Ask her questions, let her feel comfortable, play games, etc...if you're not seeing any interest than no teacher pussy for you.

I do not recommend walking in her room with a boner...unless you have a secret camera so we can see her reaction.

gadzooks
2007-10-18, 05:41
I do not recommend walking in her room with a boner...

Actually, this might be your best bet. Orchestrate some kind of "chance encounter" where you happen to stroll into the room completely naked, fresh out the shower. Gauge her reaction and go from there.

If she looks down there and just starts laughing, then you probably aren't gonna be getting any, and will risk all of the school hearing about your little escapade.

If she's shocked to the point of being almost disturbed, then you probably won't be hitting that. Just explain how it was a total freak accident and you didn't expect her to be in the room.

If she seems slightly startled, but at the same time, she seems to be having a hard time keeping her eyes off of your raging member, then maybe, just maybe, you have a glimmering hope...

NiGhT PrOwLeR
2007-10-18, 20:06
seduce her with your big dictonary

StarWarsNerd
2007-10-18, 20:39
wow you guys own at troll feeding

Lt_Flippy
2007-10-19, 02:53
Actually, this might be your best bet. Orchestrate some kind of "chance encounter" where you happen to stroll into the room completely naked, fresh out the shower. Gauge her reaction and go from there.

If she looks down there and just starts laughing, then you probably aren't gonna be getting any, and will risk all of the school hearing about your little escapade.

If she's shocked to the point of being almost disturbed, then you probably won't be hitting that. Just explain how it was a total freak accident and you didn't expect her to be in the room.

If she seems slightly startled, but at the same time, she seems to be having a hard time keeping her eyes off of your raging member, then maybe, just maybe, you have a glimmering hope...
Actually... the best scenario for you pulling this off would be her catching you wanking it.

Splam
2007-10-19, 23:03
Actually... the best scenario for you pulling this off would be her catching you wanking it.

You mean her waking up finding him wanking it directly infront of her?

robinhoody
2007-10-19, 23:37
You mean her being awoken by warm, wet droplets landing on her cheeks, and finding him wanking it directly on top of her?Yes.

Mogli of the Jungle
2007-10-20, 02:00
This thread is full of lulz

mvpena
2007-10-20, 16:07
http://www.dentalindia.com/chloro.jpg

+

http://www.wavecaps.com/images/beanies/ski_3hole.JPG


=

http://z.about.com/d/sexuality/1/7/G/3/sex_positions_woman_on_top.JPG

Chloroform = the true Love Potion No. 9

Volcanbaru
2007-10-20, 18:57
Dude....I don't know about you, but just be yourself. Try not to think too much about hitting on her or whatever. It works for me.


Seriously, come to think about it. She's putting herself in this position.

What's your relationship with this teacher? Why/how are you going? Did she pick you out of all other students or whatever; is it because of your grade blah blah? We need way more infomations than that, really.

Numberjumbo
2007-10-29, 02:30
This thread fucking owns. It could be the best thing I've ever seen on totse.

woopsueypigs77
2007-10-29, 03:14
Pics or it will never happen.

Numberjumbo
2007-10-31, 10:09
Fuck this thread owns.

TuxeyM
2007-10-31, 10:13
Fuck this thread owns.

YOU IDIOT! way to bring a thread from the dead.

doct0r_4rmo
2007-10-31, 16:01
I'm shocked that everyone hasn't realised this guy is a troll.

Chronic The Hedgehog
2007-11-01, 03:56
Its definitly possible to do...

Bkings
2007-11-01, 19:29
I hope you fuck her and then right as you cum yell out "TOUCHDOWN THURMAN THOMAS!"

whitelightning
2007-11-01, 22:08
HAHHAHAH

lol at TOUCHDOWN THURMAN THOMAS!!!

Numberjumbo
2007-11-05, 10:13
I don't get it.

AEnemia
2007-11-05, 22:29
Senior trip is coming up, and I've made it my objective to hook up with the good little Catholic girl in my class. :)

Unfortunately, the only chicks I tend to have luck with are ones I meet at parties. This girl is a "good girl", and though we're on good terms and talk sometimes, my formula of "sex+drugs+rock and roll" isn't going to work here. Not to mention, it'll be on a cruise, so that shit isn't an option anyhow.
So, any good ideas? She's single, and all the other guys who are on the trip with us have girlfriends, so I shouldn't have to compete with them.

Asmodeuss
2007-11-05, 22:43
delete

pengd0t
2007-11-06, 01:41
AEnemia:
...
...
...


If you're keep yourself nearby often enough and you two have a good time together, then eventually chances are you'll have sex.
Humans have sex for fun.
It's just what they do.

AEnemia
2007-11-06, 02:13
If you're keep yourself nearby often enough and you two have a good time together, then eventually chances are you'll have sex.
Humans have sex for fun.
It's just what they do.

Yeah, but "I'm saving myself til marriage!" type girls often don't. See where I'm going with this? I have an actual CHALLENGE here. An OBSTACLE.